The mistakes I've made are like an addiction, an addiction that will never detach itself from my soul. The bits on the white tile lay until the air from my nasal passage brings the bits through the circular plastic piece causing it to be felt in my throat. Thinking, how real everything is. Taking it from his hand feeling that hit affecting me. Trying to catch my balance but cant, stumbling from the after effect of the sips i took from the bottle. Laying on the floor realizing all this because realizing fighting for love that doesn't exist can bring you to your worst. Doing things you would never do as an excuse of being lost in life. Secrets that could never be revealed as if it was the worst sin committed yet. So many mistakes done within 24 hours for something so unreal. How can it be? I've felt it all, and feeling what I've felt is something living with is not an option. That's not who I am. wait, who am I? What I've lost over so little is unbelievable. Worth it? Not at all. What I've experienced is more than I could take on after it all hit me at once. Something so hurtful only reality could make my own person betray me right in front of my face.
& its me against reality
January 26, 2010