Dear You,

February 2, 2010
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Have you ever thought that "Hey maybe shes the one."? Have you ever wondered what it would be like if I was yours? Have you ever stopped to think about what you have done? Did you ever stop and think "Hey maybe I'm makin a mistake"? I can't help but feel all this wasted time. You seem to be awfully okay with how things are. But you dont see what I see when I look at you. I see someone who's lost. I see someone who doesn't care anymore. I see the vague sadness in you eyes. I should know you well enough by now to know when you are un-happy. I just don't understand, how you could leave all of this behind and act like it was never there to begin with. Someday I think, you'll come to your senses and I'll be wating for you. I may have said before how you were a waste of time but baby that time wasted was well worth it as long as in the end the person I get is you. I just can't help but love you. I just can't help but have these feelings. They don't just turn off when you, I or anyone else wants them to. I crave you, I want you more than anything I've ever wanted. I wish I could hate you. Have you ever wondered how I was doing, or what I was up to? Have you ever wanted to call me just to hear my voice again? I highly doubt it. I've lost my hope in you, what I feel for you is complex and confusing. It's a strange mixture of hate and love, disgust and yearning. I constantly wonder things, worry about you, and hope that your mom is okay. I love her and miss her more so than I do you some-days. But that is a different love all together, that's a mother-daughterly love we have developed over the past(almost)two years. I consider her a second mother, because for over a year of my life she was who I thought was going to be my mother-in-law someday. I haven't any clue about your feelings towards me and I wish I didn't care.
Signed, Me.

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