To Mr. Anonymous

By , Westland, MI
Dear Mr. Anonymous,

I hope that you still love me, because I LOVE YOU SO, SO MUCH. I prayed about your mother, and if she decides that she can talk to me, then I want you to know that I don't have anything against your mother. If your mom can't forgive me for what I did, as far as hurting her emotionally, then I can understand. Your mother has always been very beautiful, and I was very stupid to not build a family with her. When you were born, she wanted to have 5 more children with me, and I messed up. I used to want to be with her, but I had made the choice not to be with her, because I was convinced that she didn't love me, or even like me. I was wrong, though. She did used to love me. Because she used to love me, that is why she doesn't like me now. Your mother hated me for a long time, probably still does, but I love her anyway. I'm sorry that I hurt {your mother} emotionally, and I would do anything to make it up to her (within reason), but I can't beat myself up for disappointing her, 12 to 15 years ago. I love you, and your mother.---------------------------She's a good mom. She is who she is. It's too bad, when one person can't forgive another person, but I will not hold anything against her, because you love her, adn she has done a great job being your mother. I will not blame her for the mistakes that she's made, because I know that I broke her heart. I love her. Please know that I love your mom, and even though she treats me like I'm dead, and have been dead since 1996-I don't care. I don't have time to be mad at people, and I don't have time to care about who doesn't like me.

Now that you're old enough, I'll just remind you-that you should always love yourself...I want you to always love yourself, and when a girl doesn't do right, Just let her go. Your mom told me, that she doesn't have anything to talk to me about. At first I was pissed for her being so immature, but if that is what it takes for her to be okay, then I'll let God deal with her.--------------------------------------I was stupid, I didn't know anything about women, at all. I was very, very stupid. I didn't know how to communicate. All I knew how to do was be angry...I love you with all my heart, and I love {your mother} even if she does treat me like I'm dead for the rest of my life.

When she was pegnant with you, we were engaged to be married. One day,I came to {her church}. When I arrived, your mother was preoccupied with a guy named KC or KP, or something like that. That same day, at the Church, there was this guy named Virgil. She was my girlfriend, but she treated me like I didn't exist-so...

Three weeks later I stopped by her job to say hello, and show her that I was thinking about her. She was pregnant with you, and she had on my engagement ring. WE were going to get married. She had on BLack Jeans and a Brown buttoned down shirt. She had a picture of herself in her back pocket-and so I grabbed it out of her pocket and said thank you. She got mad at me, and snatched it back, and said that it was for her friend. I was so hurt, and confused. Here she was carrying my baby in her stomach (actually her uterus), and we were engaged to be married, and she was treating me like dirt. My heart literally broke in my chest. I treated your mom like a queen, and because we were young, and she was pregnant we got our signals crossed...I just stopped caring about how I conducted myself. I didn't mind being stupid, and doing stupid things...I got her pregnant, and it tore a hole in the relationship she had with her dad, and she treated me bad because of that...We were never able to love one another since.

I want to be a normal family...I can only be sincere, adn to be honest. My main concern is you...I have tried to walk in love, and I am only human. I can't just keep being disrespected. Pray that her heart changes, and remember that love is all about communication.

It takes too much energy to be cruel, and treat people bad...If anybody ever treats you with unforgiveness, forget about them, and ask God to bless you with better people in your life. Life is too short to waste on hate.

Love Dad





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