Breaking News: Barbie and Ken Divorce

October 30, 2009
By Anonymous

From living in a glistening dream house to separate stark toy boxes, Barbie and Ken part ways after a fake twenty-seven year marriage. Sharing the heartbreaking "riches to rags" story, the masked relationship is finally revealed.
In the public eye, the plastic family was seen as nothing but perfect. Married on Valentine's Day, Barbie and Ken played America's picture-perfect family. Barbie and Ken, having the stature of swims-suit models and the brains of rocket scientists were the world's role models. Even their only child, Kelly, was seen as a rock-star.
What the press did not know was what went on behind closed doors. The family's lives quickly turned upset down when Ken was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder. Constantly working late nights at his personal law firm, Ken began bonding with Barbie's friend and fellow co-worker, Teresa. While raising Kelly at home, Barbie found out about the affair through various e-mail accounts. Struggling through the abusive relationship alone, Barbie's dolls never suspected a thing. As if growing up was not hard enough, Kelly was suddenly forced to be the parent of the house. Breaking up fights, calling the local police, and constantly spending the night at her neighbor's house, Kelly went from playing with the toy dolls, to micro managing her parent's lives.
With the hostile break-up no longer a secret, the upper-class socialites went from being one of the wealthiest families in the neighborhood to being flat broke. Ken moved in with Teresa, taking all the money with him, forcing Barbie to raise Kelly alone without a job. As the child turned into an adult, the hopes of the vibrant pink Barbie convertible drove out of sight.
Not all is lost, in the words of Kelly. "Being from a broken home is better then living in a broken home", states the now seventeen-year-old. With the divorce in the past, Kelly regains the strength to become the honor student she was at the start of high school. Although losing two years of focus, Kelly is optimistic in believing that colleges will not hold this tragedy against her. How did I get the inside scoop on Barbie's secret life? I lived it.
Yours truly, Kiki (but you can call me Kelly).

Similar Articles


This article has 2 comments.

on Nov. 15 2009 at 5:08 am
toxic.monkey SILVER, Tashkent, Other
6 articles 0 photos 210 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Homo homini lupus"

this is awesome. i love the symbolism and the "news" format:) i hope you'll write more

893201501 said...
on Nov. 12 2009 at 9:12 pm
893201501, Calgary, Other
0 articles 0 photos 29 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." ~ Dr. Seuss

Powerful. Very, very powerful. I love the satire that's involved in this piece - and I'm assuming that "Ken" and "Barbie" are aliases for your parents. If so... I'm sorry for the life you've lived but good for you for making the best of it!

Parkland Book