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Inferiority Complex

By , Melbourne, Australia
Today, I realised I have an inferiority complex. I get that from my mum; thanks mum. While she’s
gotten over hers, (“It took me 40 years to realise it doesn’t matter what people think of me; don’t
make the same mistake as me”) I am far from that.

I realised today, when the first thing I thought when I ran into the pretty, “popular”, promiscuous girls from my
school at the shops, was, “Oh my God, my hair looks like sh*t today.” Then I thought, “Why the hell
are they talking to me?” because I couldn’t remember the last time one of them had talked to me at
school. I nearly ran out of the shop.

The usual questions ran through my mind as I walked away; are they nicer than me? No. Are they
better people than me? Probably not. Then why do I let them make me inferior? No idea. And despite
the oh-so-comforting advice from my mother, it’s freaking hard to change your mind set. I’ve had 15
years of being inferior around them, and I’m pretty used to it by now – even comfortable with it –
(Yeah, that’s pretty bad, I know) But it’s a lot easier to be inferior than it is to actually stand up to
them.

But you know what else I realised today? I have the best friends. And suddenly an inferiority

complex doesn’t seem bad when I think about my friends; the people I am comfortable around. I
don’t have to care if I think I look like crap around them; it doesn’t matter if I’m having a breakout
and I haven’t washed my hair in 3 days; because I know they don’t care. They aren’t friends with me
because of how I look. I know I sure as hell don’t care what they’re wearing; or how they do their
hair. They’re good people; and we gripe about our aesthetic insecurities together. Which makes me
really glad that I have people in my life who I am so comfortable with. Who else can I talk about
muffin tops with, and frizzy hair; and how much I wish I was somebody else, around the “popular”
girls. I realised my friends don’t just listen, they reaffirm my confidence. Who else pools the last of
their money to get me on the bus when I don’t have a ticket? Who else stays up talking all night with
me no matter how tired we are? The time I got grounded; my friends gave me the biggest care
package I have ever seen. The only thing that kept me from going mad during the 4 weeks, was the
mountain of books, magazines and chocolate. I have friends who truly care about me, and who I
know will always be there to pick me up and dust me off when I fall.

Maybe it’s not all doom and gloom coming out of today. I also realised how very much I need my
friends in my life. I think I’ll tell my friends how great they are tomorrow....you know, I can figure out
the inferiority thing another time.





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