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Volcanic Embarrassment

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The highway connecting my mouth to my brain is experiencing a traffic jam. The semis are taking up all my lanes, clogging my thoughts with exhaust and squeaky breaks. The words slept in late, and the trucks that are supposed to haul those coherent sentences to my mouth are waiting in lines of miles and miles. What I want to say isn't coming out and I'm speaking in sentence fragments of what seem like foreign languages. I search the listener's eyes in hope of finding my words. Maybe they'll come dancing out of their ears, and I can continue on. Perhaps I'll just stop the sentence with an abrupt, "OH I just LOVE your necklace!" and carry on with an easier conversation that my lifeless brain can handle.

Oh, what is it about unfamiliar faces that just discontinue the flow of thoughts to words, words to thoughts? My uncontrollable nerves disrupt the connection I am trying to make with this new person. Seconds later, and I feel my face boiling, wondering if it shows. The thought of my visible embarrassment and nervousness wrecks my thought flow even more, and my heart's racing. It pumps and pumps so hard I wonder when it'll just rip out of my chest and punch my listener in the face. I might get lucky, and some crazed asylum-escapee will come around the corner and tackle me to the ground, and my listener will save me and a whole new relationship will grow between us and I'll feel comfortable enough to talk to them. As all these thoughts cross my mind, I realize I've really lost my original idea and I'm just hitting rock bottom. I feel the sweat mustache sprout. Soon it's droplets of salty worry dripping down my crimson face. Fumbling my words, my mouth is spewing out apparent confidence issues and vivid chunks of hyperactive nerves like searing magma expelling a volcano right before the grand eruption. Maybe this eruption will wake my words up...





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Joel said...
Sept. 29, 2009 at 1:20 pm
Wow! What analogies. Fantastic description. I think you captured that emotion perfectly. Great job!
 
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