Everything must be perfect: four baby carrots (no more, no less), three teaspoons of peanut butter on his sandwich (trust me - he knows), three chocolate chip cookies, and a bottle of water all meticulously squeezed inside the dark blue lunch box. The blue lunchbox reminded him of a warm, cloudless summer sky, the deep blue ocean waves crashing on his skin, and of course Jetblue airlines which he monitored hourly from his phone covered in a dark blue rubber case. I learned these vital details quickly after I was introduced to my autistic step brother, Michael.

      Entering the world of middle school is a whirlwind for anyone; I was smacked in the face with new choices that had the potential to shape my path in life at the same time that I was adjusting to Michael’s idiosyncrasies. My previously stable household had been thrown into a state of disarray by Michael’s behavioural quirks. I’d like to paint myself as an angel, but the frustration of repeated questions and the invasion of privacy drove me up the wall... at first. However, I also began to recognize his need for constant human interaction and craving for immediate acceptance by others. My frustration gradually turned to patience and understanding once I realized his utter innocence. His ingenuous nature translated into my own life, teaching me to accept others through a non-judgmental lens.   

          Our common passion was the beach. Love for the crashing waves and the warmth of the sun drove us to convince our parents to take us to the beach as often as possible. Michael always stuck with the boogie board while I took the surfboard, but on this miraculous day he finally trusted me enough to change his ways. I coaxed him into the water–surfboard in hand– and together we waded through the shore break. As usual, the time spent waiting for his perfect wave was filled with innumerable questions and nervous chatter. In no time we both turned around and saw his opportunity. He made sure everything about his position was perfect as I pushed his board into the swell. As he noticed he was on his own, he attempted to stand then quickly fell into the water. The ride was ephemeral but in his mind he had never accomplished anything so miraculous. At the same time, so had I. I had changed his mind about something as silly as his choice of boards, but it taught us both that we could learn from each other and improve our different characters.  

          While he may have learned that great things can come from reaching outside of your comfort zone, I learned how to understand and work with someone with a different mindset and to have patience when my life does not go as perfectly as Michael can make his. This lesson is one that I have applied throughout my life: A failed test gave me motivation to perfect my study habits, a fight with a friend taught me how to be a better person, and frustration with my own shortcomings brought me back to Michael who taught me that I am perfectly imperfect, just like him. With this insight, I plan to never take my abilities for granted, and to strive to be the best possible me.