I hate birthday parties. I always felt left out. Was it because I didn’t know anyone in the parties? No. Was it because they left me out? They needed me so obviously, no. So, what could be the problem? Pizza, Pizza is the problem. Pizza discriminated against me, pizza hated me. It would not allow me to eat it, enjoy its flavors and thick cheese. Pizza is the problem, it differentiated from those who were cool and those who were fools. Forget cake, because I don’t care about it, pizza is the problem, was the problem. Yes, it was that fateful day, the day I had enough. Up till now, my parents ate the pizza and gave me the crusts who do they think I am some kind of bird, servant to eat the leftovers. Do I look like some kind of kid? I had enough, my 5-year-old pride will not tolerate this anymore, pizza WAS the problem anyway. Today was a birthday party, today was the day pizza is the problem, sorry, WAS the problem. After all the shenanigans and present openings, after the boring stuff, the time of truth came. Today, there was only one slice of pizza left in the pizza box. One slice of pizza, the thing that despised me. But today, today was different, today pizza WAS the problem. No one was looking, the parents were gossiping and the foolish children would see my defiance, my power and iron blood. I would show them that nothing can stop me. I grabbed the PIZZA, don’t do it said the voice in my head. Are you an idiot, are you deficient in the brain, you aren’t smart to begin with, but you weren’t this bad. If you eat that, you might die, explode, your intestines will fly all over the place and your brain will go all over the cake, everyone will be sad because of your stupidity. Damn, he was right. What will I do today, eat the pizza or die eating it? Eat the pizza or die, eat the pizza or not die, eat the pizza or die, eat the pizza or not die the constant struggle went on and on and on. I held the pizza eat it and die. I opened my mouth eat it and not die. I ATE IT. I ate all of it. I ate it and others watched, they knew the consequences, the parents were scared as if the four horsemen had come to find that the apocalypse did not start but RAVI TEJA ANDHAVARAPU IS KILLING HIMSELF WITH P I Z Z A. Nothing, nothing happened. I was disappointed, I expected a battle not surrender. Nothing happened, my parents were proud not scared. I was disappointed, this was no challenge. It was just a dog with all bark but no teeth. It was a great white shark but as small as guppies. Did this give me confidence? Not exactly but it did teach me two things, that I had the ability to do anything and P I Z Z A WAS THE PROBLEM AND IT NEVER WILL BE ANYMORE.
March 30, 2018