My alarm goes off, here it is, the first day of my Sophomore year. All ready and off I go. Arriving to school, seeing old friends and teachers. All my classes go by fairly fast and soon it’s sixth hour and there he is, sitting right in front of me. This is the fourth year, will it happen again I wonder? He talks to me the whole hour, I try not to get my hopes up, but I’m nervous things will change. Finally, it’s the end of the day and the bell is ringing. He takes me by surprise when he puts his hand on my back and “helps” me out the door.
Days pass by and this continues everyday. Soon he starts to text me outside of school and I talk to him everyday, all day. I talk to him more and more throughout the first few weeks of school, soon my best friend runs up to me and she says, “Are you guys really talking now?” I was super confused about who she was talking about, then I remember I had talked to her a few days earlier about how I really liked him. She talks to me about how he’s been telling her that he wants to be with me and that he doesn’t know how to ask me out.
A month and a half goes by and we’ve been dating for a month now, and it’s the homecoming game. I stroll through the hallways showing off his jersey, proud to call him mine, proud to be with him. I go to the game and I sit there with my parents, his mom, sisters, and grandpa because it’s homecoming and we all love to watch him play. They’re announcing the players off and they call out his name, I stand up and yell, “That’s my boyfriend!!” and sit back down.
I’m all ready for the dance, dress on, make-ups done, hair and nails are done, now it’s time for pictures. My mom, best friend and I all drive over to where we’re supposed to be taking pictures. I see him standing outside waiting for me, gosh he looked so handsome. We attend the dance, I start thinking to myself, “he’s never going to slow dance with me” but he ended up proving me wrong like he always accomplished.
We had a romantic night, even though my friend wouldn’t stop getting mad at me about anything. In a short time, things started going downhill and there was another girl. I felt useless to him after I found out about her. He never wanted to talk to me, never would he make time for me in his “overloaded” schedule, everything just seemed to die. Talking to him was out of the frame.
Over time we didn’t interact with each other, but when we did, our talks were brief. Soon it got to the point where we bickered about anything and it was an everyday thing. I wanted to quit and give up on the relationship, but I didn’t want to lose the boy I had been trying to get with since 7th grade. I knew as the days continued on, and I was debating back and forth on how to leave him, it soon came down to where I caught him walking her to class, then I started a loud and honestly obnoxious fight and told him, “Either you choose me or her!” He said that he chose me, but my heart felt there wasn’t truth in his words.
It’s been over a year now.
Sometimes I think about everything we went through, sometimes I wish I had never left. Lately, I’ve missed you more, I believe it’s because school started back up. I know that you’ve moved on and I’m not asking for another chance, I don’t ever think there will be another chance. I hope you know that you were a major part of my life and I hope that I was in your life too. Tell your mom and grandpa that I miss them often and a lot. I hope that school is going how you’d like, you used to never care about school, maybe things have changed. Most of all, I wish you the best of luck in what you want to do with your life.
From, the girl who still cares.