You don’t know when it’s coming, it kind of just sneaks up on you. It deliberately spirals around you like a snake trying to prey on it’s next victim. You feel the force slowly getting stronger as you start to panic. You can carry it for a day and be fine but soon after that it can start to hurt you and, if you carry it for so long, the effects can be destructive.
I have a massive resentment towards you. You cause me tremendous pain and to become incredibly distressed. No matter what I do, I find you always there with me, but why? You’re there to escort me to all of my classes, then after school, attempt to follow me to work or basketball practice, whichever the case may be. Even after my prolonged day, you’re still with me while I anxiously eat my dinner, just standing by around the corner until I leave and go onto my next task. From there on, I feel your harsh touch graze against my forehead, immediately causing me a great headache. I make out all the agonizing words you whisper in my ear, as it makes me scramble out of the shower and hurry to do all the other work that’s calling me. Long after that, I settle down and lay under my cold sheets, just to turn and see you there right beside me.
This toxic thing is called stress. I experience stress five out of the seven days of the week, which causes me to be tired, irritable , and feeling brought down. It almost feels like i'm in a tsunami and the waves keep coming over me as I try to find my way out. After a while it starts to hurt me and have short term effects on me. It almost is like carrying 20lbs in my backpack. I feel fine at first like I can handle it, but after a while I start to get tired and weak. I get stressed from school, work and basketball. I go to school for 7 hours and after school I go to work till 7. Shortly after work, I workout for an hour. I do that same schedule 3 out of the 5 days of the week, while the other two days I have basketball after school. Saturday I work and sunday I also have basketball. I try to balance out being academically successful, while working , trying to get better at the sport I love, and living a healthy lifestyle. Many times I get so stressed and overwhelmed I cry and smuggle myself under my blankets as if my problems can’t get to me from under there.
Generally as a kid you tend to think about becoming older and wanting more freedom. Generally you cannot possibly wait to become older and be in high school, until you really get to that point. You finally get older and develop into what you've always dreamed of, in expectation, you thought it was going to be the most tremendous thing ever, but it's not. You accumulate all these problems like homework on top of homework, having a social life, getting a job for the first time, playing the sport you love, living a healthy lifestyle , worry about fitting in and being accepted by others, and being mentally there. It’s such an uphill battle that you then begin to harbor being the little kid again with no worries except taking your afternoon nap that you so dreaded. Now all you want is that bothersome feeling that has been weighing you down just to go elsewhere, and this is just the beginning.
Stress can happen anywhere. It can happen in the scorching halls of Bedford high school, or in the peaceful ambience of your steaming, calm, late afternoon shower. You could experience stress while taking part in your sports practice, because I know I have experienced it then. While getting hollered at for the same frustrating mistake you continue to make, is the perfect calling for stress to come about. Stress can follow you anywhere just about, trailing you slowly waiting to pounce. It lingers around you, making you look around anxiously of what is coming. No matter what kind of stress you experience, whether it’s emotional, or intelligence, It affects you in the same way. Some people can handle it, but many times it strangles its victims, having them gasp for air. Whether you're in your own home or wandering around, it will be there waiting, waiting for the perfect moment to strike. Just don’t walk into its devious trap to snatch you up and take you on a roller coaster of a ride.
As I start to wind down, I slowly walk back to my room only to feel the slightest tap on my left shoulder. I quickly turn to my left, only to see that nothing is there. I began to hear voices all around me like surround sound speakers, blurting out “ do this, do that, you better get that done, and this better be perfect!” I began to lose it and try to get everything done, only leaving me with a few hours of sleep. I sob as I settle on my bed, forgetting about the undone tasks. I lie down and sink into my mattress, pulling the covers over me, hoping that once I wake up my problems will be gone.
Everyone is affected by stress in different ways and handles it differently. I handle mass amounts of stress by crying and running away from my problems by going to bed while others fight it and don’t let it overcome them. Stress affects my life in so many ways including school, work, basketball and just life in general. I am sort of a perfectionist, so my grades have to be perfect and I do not like to fail. I am trying to learn to not sweat the small things in life and that everything doesn’t have to be perfect. In the end, everything will be okay, with your friends and family by your side. Stress or no stress, I got this.