I never really took it seriously when my dog Chaz went to the Vet because we noticed how he was limping, his leg was hurting him and nobody assumed it was broken. It makes sense how he died now that I think about it, he was an old dog with weak bones and would cry daily and we didn’t do anything to help, we didn’t think anything was wrong. I was only 7 when he died. Back when he was healthy, he would run around and would get into fights with my other dog Zeus, he would make this odd noise that sounded like he was dying but he wasn’t so me and my brother would laugh now and then. Back when he was healthy, he used to start breathing so loud when getting ready for walks to the Quarry trail, Supply Pond, or to Young’s Pond, that it would make me and my brother laugh so hard the air would leave our bodies and would make us fall on the ground dying of laughter. We started giving him nicknames like Chubby or Walrus. He slowly got bigger and bigger, older and older. Soon he got to 13(91 in dog years I think). No matter what we still loved him. Back when he was obese, but healthy, we would take him on rocks and we would have to assist him over some big rocks or something that he wouldn’t be able to climb. Back when he was obese, but healthy, he would get tumors and warts that would get big enough for him to get them removed. That started the whole sad little dog faze. Back when he was sad, but was somewhat healthy, he would not want to go on walks, he would just want to sit on the floor all day, sleep and cry. Back when he was sad, but somewhat healthy, he would cry and cry and cry until the point where me and my brother would not laugh or asses off, but to the point when we had to scream at him to shut up, or leave him outside all day. Nobody knew that all of that crying would soon lead to him dying.

I actually was the one who noticed that he was limping so we brought him to the little vet place by BHS. The Veterinarian told us it wasn’t really anything to worry about, he’s just getting older and his bones would get weaker. He didn't like the medicine that we gave him, he started to do some sort of cry, and he kept doing that until he died.

When he died I was in my room just trying to sleep, my brother was downstairs and my dogs were outside because they kept begging. My window was open so I would be able to hear if anything seemed wrong, as time passed, my dad came in the driveway. Usually, if someone comes in with a car, my dogs get excited and jump up. Chaz, on the other hand, was not excited or thrilled, instead he was in pain because his leg literally snapped. His cry sounded so painful, I thought it was a coyote. It just sounded painful and loud. I came downstairs and met my brother by the door. We both looked like we have seen a ghost, it was just scary. I asked him “Nick what is that noise.” He had no clue but we ran outside anyways. My brother Nick yells out “Dad, dad, what is that?!” I don’t even pay attention, I don’t know what he said, all I saw was Chaz and the ground making that strange noise. I didn’t think that he would die until that long car ride to North Haven.

Chaz was just laying on the ground when it seemed like the leg that snapped has just lost its will to live anymore, the other three were fine, but that one bone, just didn’t look good at all. There was blood on his leg, looked as if it was not even apart of his leg anymore, it was bent, curved and just swollen. My dad told me to watch him and just pet him, so maybe he wouldn’t have a panic attack being left alone in that kind of condition. I didn’t know what my dad was doing, or he did tell me but I just can not really remember. Then my brother Nick comes outside telling me that dad is telling me to call mom, when I walked inside, he was googling a close little pet hospital to help him. I was telling my mom how his leg was broken and she told me to go to this place in North Haven and that it was a good place to help him.

I got in the backseat of my dad’s truck, and my dad and brother were in the front. I was sitting with Chaz, he was laying on the seat and I was just rubbing his fur so he wouldn’t feel lonely or breath heavily and feel uncomfortable. I wasn’t thinking that he was going to die, not a single thought said he would die. In my head it was only a broken bone, not anything too much to kill him.

By the time that we were halfway there, my dad said something that I feel like I would never forget, It sticks out most in this memory just for how shocked I was. “If he ends up to go into surgery, we won’t pay for it and he will have to die”. Then he was talking about how he was old and he would die sooner or later so we decided to not pay for surgery. After we had the talk, my stomach felt weak and just painful but I still had feelings that Chaz wouldn’t die, I just knew it. So we got at the hospital and we we didn’t move in the car when he parked the car. It took 1 minute for my dad to unlock the doors and to get out. He told us “Wait here for a few minutes, I’ll be right back”. So we waited for a good 10 minutes and we did not say a word the entire time in the car. We both were scared, I think my brother already knew that he was dead. At the time i was too young to understand that broken bones can kill you if you are too old or obese. I would think only a heart attack or something in his gut could kill him. Then when I actually got inside There were two people going out with a stretcher. My dad asked me if I wanted a drink and I asked for a Gatorade. Then a lady who works there sent us to this room, nothing in it but a chair and a table.

I waited in that room for over an hour thinking all good things, until she came in with the news about Chaz’s leg. I forget what she said exactly but all I really remember is her starting off the sentence as if she were to say some good news. Then she said the word but. My eyes widened, and I lost breath. My Stomach started to hurt and cramp up. I felt sick and heartbroken at once.

The nurse had told me and my brother why we could not help his leg. She said because he was too old and that even if they had fixed his leg they would not of been able to keep him alive after the surgery for how old he was. Then she said another reason was because he was fairly obese also. I don't know why, but when she said he was fat, I smirked a little laugh in there and it had reminded me of when we use to call him names because of his weight. Who knew that the weight had been a reason he had died. If I knew that earlier, than maybe I would not of made fun of him. About 5 minutes later, they brought Chaz in on the stretcher, he was breathing heavily and it got me more sad, I asked why he was breathing so loud and heavy. My mom, said as a nurse, so she knew what is was ¨It's a certain medicine that does not make him feel pain. All we could do is pet him and watch him die. I started to cry when I saw him come into the room. I was thinking that how could this happen and why would this happen to us.

Time flied and before I knew it, the nurse had told me it’s time, she asked me “Do you want to stay with him as he dies?” I said no. It would be too hard for me at the time, too devastating. My brother stayed in the room as he died. So did my parents. I waited in the the waiting room alone sitting on a chair just staring at the floor with tears on my face. Then, my brother started to cry harder, I heard my mom even cry, that’s when I knew he just died. It’s hard to believe that one day you would think someone you love is perfectly fine, just a few months to live, maybe years. But then a day flies and that one person you love is suffering from pain, out of nowhere, or was it out of nowhere? Maybe I was just too dumb to see he was in pain the whole time, Maybe it was my fault he died.