My phone vibrated five times before I snatched it from my bedside table and stuffed it into my pillow case. Pulling the sheets over my head to block out the light from the window, I was drowning in thoughts: Should I pick up the phone? But then again, what has she ever done for me? She’s such a drag, always bragging about all the horrible things that have happened to her, as if it were really something to brag about. I don’t care what time it is, if you’ve called me six times in a row and I don’t answer, I am either busy, asleep, or maybe I’m just not in the mood to talk!

“Shut up!” I screamed as my pillow violently vibrated my face, making my nose tingle. “Five freaking messages … you have got to be kidding me,” I cursed.

It’s not that she had done anything wrong – well, that was a lie, she had: she was the absolute worst friend. She was what I’d call a topper. No, not like a cake topper – like a person who always has to top everything you say. If you sprained your ankle, she has broken hers twice and also has a cold. Basically, no matter what I say, something much bigger and much worse has happened her.

Maybe I just didn’t want to deal with that. Maybe I wanted a real friend who would actually validate my feelings. So instead of calling her back or texting, I did nothing. Nothing at all.

Still in bed, face buried in my pillow, I scrolled through text messages that were screaming my name, all of which had arrived in a matter of minutes. Cringing, I listened to six voicemails that said the same thing over and over.

“Hey, Sarah, it’s Erin. Just wanted to know if you could hang out today. Call me back when you get this.”

No! I don’t want to hang out today, I resolved. I had a bad day on Friday, and all you could do was talk about how much crappier your life is than mine. If I am there for you on your bad days, why aren’t you there for me? I’m a person with feelings! So on my Saturday, I’m going to hang out with someone fun. Someone who won’t try to top everything I say and make it all about themselves.

It was 2 p.m. by the time I dragged myself out of bed and called Molly. I watched Erin’s snapchat story as a pit formed in my stomach. It was her picture with the caption #WhenSheDoesn’tRespond. The feeling of drowning flooded back again. Erin continued to call and text the whole day, but I figured I could tell her that my phone had been on vibrate.

By three I headed over to Molly’s. We went out for pizza then did some shopping. I had finally totally forgotten about Erin. But my fun ended when we went for cupcakes. It all came down to shoes. Molly and I had been careful, never posting pictures of the same thing and never pictures of our faces – nothing that would suggest we were in the same place. At the bakery, there was this little animatronic sheep that baaaahed and ran around in circles. He was so cute! We named him Jeff Baaahsome. I made a video of the little white puffball smashing his head into Molly’s pink floral tennis shoe. I couldn’t resist posting it on my snapchat story.

Like a stalker, literally two seconds later, Erin watched my snap story and recognized Molly’s shoe. Then came the text battle, bullets flying, my mental walls were closing in and the water level rose higher and higher. I wanted to crawl into a ball and die.

Erin said she couldn’t believe I was hanging out with Molly behind her back while she was waiting all day for me. She said that if I didn’t want to do something with her, I should have just said so. She could have found someone else to hang out with, instead of wasting her Saturday waiting for me to call back.

Even though Erin wasn’t a good friend to me, I realized I shouldn’t have left her hanging. I would hate it if someone had done that to me. By being honest and saying I didn’t want to hang out or that I already had plans, I could have averted a war.

I instantly texted Erin back and apologized over and over, trying to make it right.

“I’m so sorry. I messed up. I was just angry about Friday! I should have just told you I was mad.”

“Yeah, you should have.”

I was shocked that she couldn’t forgive me after I genuinely apologized. But I had learned a lesson about friendship. After that I started being really blunt. Now, I tell people when I don’t want to hang out, when I have other plans, or when I just need some space. Being direct has saved me a lot of drama.

As for Erin, I pretty much ended the friendship by blowing her off. But looking on the bright side, any friend who won’t forgive me for making stupid mistakes now and again isn’t a real friend anyway.