I remember the day it started like the back of my hand. It’s something I can’t let go. Last year, it was toward the end of the school year when I found out I had Depression. Turns out I’ve had it since 5th grade. Now I know why. When I came home from school one day, I went straight across the street from my house to my Grandpa and Grandma’s house. I was planning to practice my clarinet with my friend/tutor Jaida. I dropped off my stuff and Jaida, and I, went back across the street to my house to check on one of my cavies (Guinea pigs) because her was sick. 
I opened his cage and saw him with his eyes closed. I’ve never seen him with his eyes closed before. I tried to give him hay but he wouldn’t respond. Then, I picked him him up. He was as light and stiff as a piece of wood. I was frightened and was thinking, “What the H-E- double hockey sticks is happening?!” I dropped him back in his cage. He was wobbling back and forth like a hula hoop that was hitting the ground. I ran to get my step-dad. He said that Happy was dead. I felt something snap inside me. But I couldn’t fall apart yet, I..it didn’t feel...comfortable, with the situation. 
The next day when I came to school, I got off the bus crying. My friends kept saying, “What’s wrong?! What’s wrong?!” But I couldn’t hear them. I just kept walking. All I heard, was my heart pounding against my ribcage, and myself crying. I kept picturing Happy hitting the surface of his cage like a hula hoop hitting the group, and the feeling when I held him. Light and stiff as a piece of wood. My old 4th grade teacher ate lunch with me. I explained to her that Happy was the cavy (Guinea pig) that started my 4-H career. 4-H changed my life. He’s the one that started it for me, and I’m very thankful for that. 
This will be my fifth year in 4-H. To this day, I carry the picture of Happy and winning my first trophy, in my binder every day. That was our first year. 4th grade. I was dressed up in a white long sleeved button-up shirt, with black pants and shoes. My shirt was tucked in, just like the rules said. I was proud, and I was nervous. My air was in two braids with a couple 4-H ribbons holding them up. My glasses were cleaned, Happy looked all nice with his bright orange and black coat and ruby cast eyes. He was a Broken, American, Senior, Boar. As the judges would say anyway. It was the first round when we won that trophy. I was so proud of Happy, and myself.
There were also times when I got very upset with him though. Even though, he would sit still on the light brown carpet square, he was always the one to start the bloody wars with our other cavy Buddy. Buddy died a few months after Happy did. That’s a different story though.Happy and I, never really connected, it was more of me just, appreciating him, for starting my 4-H experience. I miss Happy, and I always will. More, and more, every minute, of every day, of every month, of every year. I will never forget the day he died. The day my Depression started, Sometimes you have to let go, but I will always, have flashbacks of Happy.