The Big Change | Teen Ink

The Big Change

October 27, 2014
By Hamer123 BRONZE, Clarkston, Michigan
Hamer123 BRONZE, Clarkston, Michigan
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

One day my mom came in my room and sat down on my bed and asked me
“How do you feel about moving?”
“I think that would be pretty cool.”
“How do you feel about me and jay getting a divorce?”
“I think moving would be pretty cool but not so cool about you and jay getting a divorce.”
“okay”
“ where would we be moving too?”
“ we would move into a nicer house and possibly on a lake”
“awesome it would be so fun to live on a lake.”
I was in 8th grade when my mom asked me about moving. I thought the moving part would be kinda cool, but I felt very confused and kind of hurt about her and Jay getting a divorce.  She still never mentioned the city we’d be moving too. I was really excited about what she told me. It was my dream to live on a lake. The next day I went to school and told all of my close friends that I maybe moving. I was excited about it because I thought i’d be going to the same school but moving into a better house. They all told me that the closest lake is 45 minutes away and wouldn't still be going to the same school. I didn't believe them. As the time went by moving still wasn't a for sure thing yet. My mom and jay both were acting different towards each other.  They Were fighting and they weren't talking as much.They also weren't sleeping in the same bed anymore. My Mom started talking about moving in the summer she still didn't give me much information about it. At the time I still thought everything was going to be okay.

As the summer got closer my mom told me the town was called Clarkston.I still really didn't  think much of any of this yet. As the days went by my mom and I made a set plan that we would be moving to Clarkston.The set date was July 3rd the day right before the 4th of july. At this time my step dad didn't know where we were moving too. I didn't like the idea of him not knowing because I thought it should be his right to know but according to my mom is was none of his business. I Still Don't know what was happening to them. or why they wanted a divorce. My mom said that I Was too young to understand what was going on. My friends kept trying to convince me to tell my mom not to move because they knew I wouldn't be going to the same school but I kept telling them everything was going to be okay. My mom told me that I would not be going to “Summit Academy” anymore when we move because it would be to far away. I’d been going to Summit since 5th grade. I loved my school. I had tons of friends I was on the cheer team I Liked My classes and my teachers. everything was perfect. I didn't really think of going to a new school would be a big deal because I thought that I would still be able to see all of my friends when I would move. it was finally summer and the school year ended. I still wanted to do cheer so me and mom found out that clarkson had a really good cheerleading program. I was very interested in it. One day in the summer me and my mom drove out to clarkston so I could try out for the team. I was very nervous because the team was already made because they had tryouts before the school year ended but I wasn't there for them because I didn't go to Clarkston schools at the time. I was very scared because I didn't know any of the girls that were on the team. I tried out I did well enough to make it. My mom thought it would be good for me to be on the team because I would atleast know some people that go to clarkston schools before school started. The same day that we drove out we also explored clarkston It was a huge city with lots of lakes, with big new houses. It was very different from where I used to live. After exploring around  we even went out to lunch. We went to a restaurant in downtown clarkston called the Woodshop I got a hamburger filled with cheese it was the best thing i've ever tasted. After we ate lunch we drove back home. Since I made the cheer team I had to go to the practices. Me and mom mom still haven't moved out yet so I would leave early in the morning to go to practices that were all the way in clarkston which is an hour away. It was finally the day that we would be moving to clarkston michigan.
We have been packing for a while but today was the day we were moving all of our stuff into our new house. moving is a lot of work. My mom had some of her friends that helped us out with all of the heavy boxes, and all of the furniture we wanted to take with us. it took us a few hours to get everything to the new house. I felt so relieved when we got all of our stuff unpacked and set up.I

Still had a month or two before school started. I didn't know anybody that lived in clarkston but a few girls on my team and I barely talked to them. The things I didn't think about when I moved is that it was just me and my mom. None of my family was there and neither were my friends it was just me and my mom thats it. My mom got a job in Clarkton and she always had to work so I was always stuck at home by myself while my friends from home were all together hanging out. It made me very upset. I would always ask to hangout with them but my mom always said no because it was too far away. I was starting to get tired of staying home alone all summer. I just Wanted to be "home" with all of my friends and family. I started falling into depression because I Was never able to see any of my family or my friends anymore and I didn't have any friends in clarkston so I became very lonely. I just sat in my room on my bed thinking when is this all going to end. There wasn't  a day where I wouldn't cry. I
was thinking when will my mom stop working to be with me when will I be able to see my friends
again? I got so depressed that I didn't want to be here anymore. I Never thought that I would get through this or would ever get over it. I started blaming myself and was saying that it was my fault we moved and what if. What if I told my mom no. What if I told her I wanted to stay "home" What if I said no?  would I still be happy? Would I still be with my friends and family? I would constantly asked my mom can I please hangout with my friends and she denied
me everytime.

All I did that summer was stay home and be like a shell. On the first day of school it was very scary for me. No one wants to be the new kid. I was all on my own for the first few days. I eventually started making friends. I still never hang out with anybody on the weekends. I was a very shy person and wouldn't talk to anybody.I was still in depression.  I hated everybody and didn't want to be in this s*** hole. I didn't care about school. I didn't care about my grades. I just gave up on everything and hoped to move back. As the year went by I failed a few classes and pretty much screwed up my whole freshman year because I didn't care enough to even try. I didn't get along with most of my teachers. I always had problems. The only people that I started to hang out with was the people on my team and there was only a few. I still wanted all of the pain I had to go away and I would do anything for it to go away. I just wanted to get over all of this bullsh*t. I tried everything and I couldn't get over it. Moving to clarkston was one of the hardest things that i've ever had to do i’m my life. I was to young to be thinking about all of the negative thoughts I had. I was just done. i'd even pray. I  thought that would maybe help but things got worse. it made all of my beliefs change.  I would always say to myself  “Why do bad things happen to good people?” At school I started getting closer to people and started hanging out a little more but I was still having a hard time.

During my freshmen year I barely had any friends. I had a really hard time that year. But the summer going into my sophomore year was much better than the summer before I had some friends that I was able to get outta the house and be sociable. I was a little bit happier. It was a lot better than just sitting at home by myself in a new town with nobody there with me. The next school year I made tons of friends and got close with people on my team and felt more comfortable being around them than I did before. My depression was still there but I was slowly getting over it. My sophomore year I was doing better in school. My grades were going up. I still didn’t think I was  going to get over it. During that school year I was doing much better than the year before because I was getting to know more people made me feel alot better. The summer going into my junior year was the best summer yet. I had tons of friends I hung out with people everyday. I was never home. I was 10x happier than I was my freshmen year. I was finally getting over it. I never thought I was going to be this happy again. At this time I told myself I couldn't see myself being at my old school anymore, and that I couldn't see myself hanging out with my old friends.The reason why I told myself this was because I finally overcame it.

After those few years I finally did it. I finally moved on. I was finally happy again. What I learned about myself is it that i’m a lot stronger of a person than I thought I was. I thought I was weak. I thought I would feel depressed forever. I thought my life was over. I learned no matter how hard life is you can always overcome it. You can always move on no matter how hard it is. You can do it. I also learned that you shouldn’t do stupid things to try to overcome it because worse things will happen. Just always be strong no matter how weak you feel. I’m a completely different person today. It was a good lesson for me Because I learned a lot about my self and became a stronger and a braver person. Yeah it sucked for the past few years but I overcame it. If I can do it you can do it. Going through this at a young age means a lot of mean because I overcame it all and eventually got through it. It also made me a better person and I think that’s a very important part of all of this is that I know who I am today and I know I can do anything if I put my mind to it. 



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