When people refer to their grandparents I usually hear positive things that are related happy memories or fun times that they’ve spent with them. This unfortunately was not the case regarding my mom’s dad. I remember the event taking place around 3 years ago, my parents gave me the worst and most life changing news I would ever receive in my early years. My mom and dad were getting a divorce. This crushing news came to me as a surprise and at first i wasn’t sure if I was in reality at that moment. The news crushed everyone, including my siblings, family, friends, and especially me. But what I didn't realize was that in the midst of this time of confusion and grief the only ones who didn’t seem to bother themselves with our feelings and situation, was my grandfather. Right when my family needed him and his family’s support and comfort, they decided it was the the best decision to move and leave us without even giving us a goodbye or any reason other than the unspoken truth they didn’t want to get caught up in this mess and that they the selfish cowards were only looking out for themselves who only hoped to get out of this conflict unscathed. To this day i have no idea what they believed was going to happen by just leaving for us to deal with not only our mess but the illicit products they brought to my family and our home during their temporary stay here. My grandfather was never very bright as my mom describes him, which was proven right before my very eyes when this man decided to build a shed and a pool without our nor the town’s consent to construct multiple illegal structures in our backyard. Not only did he create the problem but he left it so we would be there to be the ones to pick up after him and all the mistakes he’s made.

I will never forget the day when they left. It is so vivid that to this day, I remember the terrible day that would only add kindle to the flame of hatred, anger, and sadness that was burning inside me that grew as each day dragged on and on, carrying new and unfortunate uncertainties every day I awoke to. I remember right after school I got off the school bus expecting to arrive to the usual scenery of my house that was displayed before me like a picture everyday I exited that bus. However on that day, the picture was smudged with an unfamiliar object, it was a moving van. Very confused and curious I started walking closer knowing that with each step I grew closer to discovering the reason for the arrival of this truck. Although I had a sneaking suspicion about the truth that continuously gnawed at the back of my head like a rat trapped in a tight place, desperate to get out; I ignored it, secretly hoping it was not true. Then the moment came, that quick moment that in reality was only a few seconds but felt like an eternity, the phrase that hit me with emotions like emotionless, cold, dull, and even bored which seeped into my very soul breaking and crushing every little shard of hope I had regarding the support of my family,”bye, I’ll miss you”. From then until this day I have never even considered that phrase a goodbye of any kind. Today I view it as just a little string of letters, hastily and halfheartedly created that wasn’t given any effort to consolidate the targeted audience, or me. Blankly I replied “yeah, miss you too.” I recall then as soon as the door shut behind me as i entered my house I started to grasp what had just happened and what was happening. Seeing how I was very desperate I made the decision to call my mom and ask, hoping that she held the answers to whatever I asked. One after the other questions oozed from my mouth such as;”What’s going on?” “Where are they going?” “Does it have to do with your divorce?” “Will they ever come back?” Sadly my mom did not have all the answers for she too had asked herself the very same questions.

That day destroyed me. I remember feeling caught up in a wave of numbness, confusion, sadness, and anger… especially anger. I didn’t understand how my own grandfather would just leave me and my family so abruptly without any explanation or valid reason… or how he couldn’t give his own grandchildren a proper goodbye and instead we were given the pathetic excuse of an emotionless and uncaring goodbye we received. What baffles me to this day was that they didn’t stay until they had even given a slight bit of emotional or financial support before they left. After my grandfather’s departure the first few months were hard to overcome due to the fact that I wasn’t given the full story until I was older and seen as mature enough to handle it. Not only was i feeling lost, I was feeling abandoned with no one but my mom and a couple relatives to help me overcome this. During this time period I felt as though my grandfather and his 2nd family didn’t love or give a care in the world about me or any member of my family, and to this day I feel the exact same way. As the months went on I began to resent my grandfather and his family more after each passing day. This was partly due to how my mother and relatives shared stories about who my grandfather truly was. This side however seemed alien to me because he never showed it around us. As the stories increased my view of him as a conman and a liar increased. I believe that to this day he and his family believe they have done nothing wrong and I will never have anything to say to them if they do. However, although this has been a journey of pain and loss it has taught me to get rid of whatever negatives in my life that may bring me down in life.