The Dead Beauty

February 28, 2012
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"Mirror, mirror on the wall, whose the fairest of them all?" A memorable line from the famous Snow White. After obsessing over this movie, along will all other princess movies, I started to think of myself as a princess. But, a normal girl can only pretend to be a princess for so long.

My oldest sister attends college in Arizona. My family and I go up and visit her sometimes over long weekends. However, this one particular trip I went on, was with my grandmother, my brother, and my sister's boyfriend. But this story isn't about the adventures we had, no, it is about the after the "happily ever after." The unfortunate truth, that we all never thought would come.

After and enjoyable trip seeing my sister, I was making my way back to Las Vegas with the gang. I was 13 years old with no sense of reality. I was a short pudgy kid who loved chocolates. Being a young girl, however, didn't even detour my grandmother.

"The reason why you are so fat is because of those dam chocolates. You have just sat their eating them for an hour. That is also the reason your skin looks like crap and you can't get a guy to even remember your name," my grandmother tells me.

Now my grandmother loves me, she really does. But, she happens to favor my eldest sister who is not only thin and pretty, she is smart, athletic, and talented at many things. I have always been compared to her and I am used to it. That does not stop the pain every time someone tells me I will never be as good as my sister.

"You aren't smart or have any goal in life. You have zero redeeming qualities! The only hope you have is to become anorexic and get a wealthy husband. Just like your mother."

Currently, we are 3 hours from home and I am mortified. My sister's boyfriend and I are sitting in the back and he hasn't turned away from that window since we left. My brother, on the other hand, just keeps nodding and smiling at whatever my grandmother says. That little troll. He eats a thousand times worse then me and doesn't gain a pound.

I put down the chocolates and tune out her rant. What's the point? I am embarrassed and depressed. You know the worst thing? I am also like that troll; just nodding my head. With every insult she delivers, I crawl deeper into my chair. As if that could hide me from the truth. I am fat, stupid, and ugly. Everything she accused me of. I have just been hiding behind all these lies that my fairy tales gave to me. There is no prince charming and no one will save me.

For the rest of the ride, I sat in silence. I starred at my phone thinking who I could call. My beautiful and talented sister? Possibly my straight A friends? For the first time I realized, I might not belong with these people. I am not the princess I once dreamed of being. I am not even the small mousy friend. I am the girl in the background no one even notices. I am just scenery and I finally had to face the truth, my dreams of being a princess are dead.

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