early childhood

My favorite place is Maine because it is so beautiful and I have been going there every summer since I moved to Danbury CT. I was also born there in Portland hospital but every summer we go to Scarburo its like 5 or 10 minutes away from Old Orchard Beach. Another reason I love Maine so much is because I get to spend a lot of time with my family because I really don’t get to do that because my family isn’t really close and I hate that the most but when were in Maine just for that 1 week it feels like were one big happy family. I love going back up to Portland when I’m in Maine because there are so many places to shop and buy things its like New York streets with stores everywhere its amazing my mom loves it to.

I was ashamed of myself for

I was ashamed of myself for relapsing recently I thought about it a lot and how it made my mother feel because I was doing so well and my mom was so proud of me and starting to trust me again and I just when out and drank like it was nothing throwing all the clean time I had right out the window. It made me feel like I just let everyone down and everything I did and when through to get clean and were I was, was just for nothing. Sitting in front of everyone in the NA and my mother at the NA meetings that I go to after getting up and getting my white key tag was just so embarrassing and I felt like so was my mom and the day I get my white key tag every one was going up to get there key tags for having a lot more time then me. It made me feel like a failure and I fucked up because all I would talk about in the meeting was getting my eighteen months and I was only like 20 days away from getting it and I couldn’t take it, I tried to hold it in as hard as I could but I couldn’t I just started showing tears. My mother and everyone else told me it happens to everyone and that its healthy for your recovery but I just felt like I let down my mom and that she’s not proud of me anymore and it felt good making my mom proud seeing that look on her face like she just want to jump up and say “that’s my boy.” In a way I feel like I’m not going to see that look on her face again and I’m not going to get her trust back that I have been working so damn hard for because the number one goal in life right now is earning it back because I love her more than anything in the world.

I was proud of myself

I was proud of my self when I got let out of the last residential I was in for a year because I learned a lot from it and I know that I did and it made me feel good that I actually finished and I did a good job and that I actually did get better and made me grow. It made my mom so much happier when I got out because she knew that I grew and that made her proud of me and that’s what made me so happy.

One of the saddest times of my life was
One of the saddest times of my life well the saddest time was when I was taken away from my mother I was sitting in class in the 5 grade and they called me down to the main office. So when I got down there I saw a man and a woman in suits and they told me to go with them so I did. They took me to a office building and sat me down when we got in side and they told me that I couldn’t go back home and I couldn’t see my mom for a little and I just started crying for like 3 hours straight it was the most pain of my life.
My favorite holiday is….. because…..


My favorite holiday is thanksgiving because my family isn’t really the closest family ever so we don’t really get to actually sit down and be a family and have a nice meal all together and that’s why I love thanksgiving because that is the only time that we actually do get to do that with the family and I like eating with my family I just wish that we could do it a lot more often.

I realized that I was no longer a child when….

I realized that I was no longer a child when I started doing what I had to do to better my life and get it on the right track. See a lot of people would say I realized I wasn’t a child when I started smoking weed or got arrested and started getting into trouble but I don’t feel like that is growing up because if your still doing stupid stuff and not trying to do good that you are still a child just trying to have fun before your grow up and at some point you have to grow up for some people it will happened faster than others but other people just stay in that child mentality now you can be a grown man but still be a child because you don’t act like a man. A real man gets his priorities right and does what he has to do.





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