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"Hey." I rubbed my arms numbly, eyes down to the ground, slight smile playing on my lips. All the symptoms of being shy. No, not shy, nervous. Nervous about what be said next.
"Hi." I glanced up, let my eyes scan his face, searching, reading. His lips smiled gently. Shadows danced over his face because it was downcast. Eyes filled with sadness and longing and... what was that look? Hope?
I raised my arms and put them behind my head, grasping the opposite elbows and stretched. There were three kids on the merry-go-round. Screaming, attempting to make it go faster than any of them could run. Damien was in the far tennis court, past the pagoda and the parking lot. Dylan wasn't paying any attention to me, he was absorbed in the arts and crafts the park aids had brought today, playing with Michael.
"Why are you here? Do you want my brother to see you? We could get caught."
I glanced over at Dylan again, Damien was walking towards me, impatient because I'd promised him a match today. I panicked. "I'll be over in two hours, by bike. Okay?" I looked at him, sadness suddenly more prominent in his eyes. He nodded and without a word, faded into the shadows of the street and disappeared.
"Who was that?" Damien asked, grabbing my wrist and twisting me around to face him.
"I don't know, he just wanted to know if his little brother was here. He's not."
"Oh. Are we going to get this game in motion or what?"
"Got two rackets today?"
"Good, because you're going to play with one and I'm going to whoop your butt with the other one."
"Hello? I'm here." The apartment seemed empty, but appearances are often deceiving. I heard the faint hiss of rushing water in the pipes in the walls. Whispery music drifted towards me, the beat was a definite sign that he was here. I grabbed a Creme Soda out of the mini fridge and turned on some cartoons. Spongebob, dressed as Patrick, came onto the screen at the same time he came out of the bathroom.
"Sorry, I was in the shower."
"Why do I care if you were getting clean?" I stood up and clicked off the television. Boldly, I took a step forward, I didn't want to be afraid of the one I loved. Confusion danced across his face, my courage faltered. He closed the distance between us and wrapped his arms around me. I encircled my arms around his bare chest and back, he was so warm and smelled like fresh rain, mown grass, and Garnier Fructis. I looked up, letting forgiveness burn every crevice of my body, hoping he'd see. Pure joy and raw ecstasy ripped through his eyes. His hands cradled my face to his, "Oh Jonny, I'm so sorry..." The words sounded deep and husky.
His mouth came down on mine. Soft and gentle suddenly turned to passion and full of love. I was afraid. I pulled away.
"It's okay. I'd never hurt you Jay. It's okay. You're safe." Safe? Hah! That's not something I'd ever know, but I was content. And that was all that mattered.