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Making My Own Name

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People say younger siblings live in their older sibling’s shadow; I can honestly say that is an understatement. I am constantly reminded of how pretty, athletic, popular, and funny my older sister is. Sometimes I just want to say to people, “That’s great, but why are you telling me?” Do people honestly think I want to hear about how fantastic my sister is? I’m basically referred to as Paige’s little sister on a regular basis. And even though I nod and pretend that’s okay with me I’d rather be known as Erin, just Erin. I love Paige dearly, but it’s not so easy being her little sister.

The worst of all the comments I’ve received (and trust me, I’ve heard this one a lot)”Your sister is so pretty…you look nothing like her.” When someone says this to me I stare at them for a good five minutes then walk away. I understand they weren’t meaning this in a bad way, but honestly how clueless can one person be? She has always been popular and most of the time I think it’s pretty cool, but sometimes I get jealous simply because I feel like I’m not as great as she is. In both grade school and high school all the boys have practically been obsessed with her including my friends. I must say I do envy that part of her life. But truthfully she is pretty awesome so I guess I can understand where they are coming from.

Sports have been a major part of my family’s life since I can remember. My sister has always been extremely athletic and good at whatever sport she played, especially basketball. I’ve played basketball since I was in second grade and I’m constantly compared to her. She also played for my current school all four years and now that I play, I try my hardest to live up to her potential. I know I’m not fast like her or can’t jump as high as she can so why do I need to be reminded of this? Sometimes I wish other people would think of my feelings first before they decide to make comments like that. But in all honestly she really is great at basketball and I would never wish she wasn’t because I know it’s such an important part of her life and I would never take that away from her.

The only thing I’ve ever had over my sister is intelligence. I’m not saying she’s dumb or anything, but I’ve always been able to be in higher level classes and get better grades than her. Sometimes I hold it against her just so she can see how it feels (I know that sounds awful) and of course then she will go in a long tirade about how she’s generally an overall better person. Although we are three and a half years apart we fight constantly and about the most pointless things. Clothes, sports, and make-up are just a few to name. But even though externally it may seem that we hate each other I can truly say I love her deeply and would do anything for her.

Although I don’t particularly like being in my sister’s shadow, sometimes it really isn’t that bad. Like when she’d play basketball and do really well, I wanted people to know I’m her sister because I was so proud of her. Or when someone compliments her style, they basically are complimenting mine too because we share clothes. I wouldn’t dare tell her this but honestly she’s my role model in life. I base many of my decisions on the advice she gives me and the way she handles situations. I know I can go to Paige for anything and she’ll always help me out. Now that she’s off to college I miss her more than ever. And although I can finally make my own name for myself and no longer be Paige’s little sister, I know I would honestly rather be in her shadow than not have her at all.





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