He said we would always be best friends. We were going to move to California, go to college together, and live happily ever after. We did everything together, and i loved him. It was the love that made me ignore the bruises. The love that made me believe the hitting, the scratches, the bruises.. that they were normal. It was that love that made me follow him to that secret room. The love that told me 'go ahead, let him touch you, he loves you'. It was that love that made me give him my virginity. It was the love that was too ignorant with bliss to notice he wouldn't kiss me. I continued to let him use and abuse me. Finally my senses broke throught the haze of love. I asked him, why no intamacy? Why couldnt he say he loved me? That didnt suit well. He was used to getting his way.. The night he raped me was the night i died. It has taken time, and a lot of people to help me come back to life, and sometimes im still scared that i'll slip, but im gaining strenghth. I will never be blinded by love again.
August 5, 2010