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Parting Is Such Sweet Sorrow

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We turned and walked our separate ways; the inevitable split. I knew I couldn’t look back, because looking back means remembering, and the goal here is to forget. Rewind back to the summer of ’06, when everything was carefree and there were no problems. I had never had a real ‘best friend’ before. Sure, I had friends, but none quite like this.

Nick and I were the most unorthodox pairing of human beings. We fought like a married couple, which usually meant one of us would storm off in anger, only to return the next day so we could hang out. If you didn’t know us, you might think that we hated each other. Our days consisted of incessant provocation for both of us. I was often asked why I hung out with him if he made me so mad, and the answer was simple: he was my best friend. Nick drove me crazy, and I know I annoyed him on more than one occasion, but that didn’t mean we weren’t friends. He understood me, or at least tried to. Nick was someone who only cared for a few things in his life, but the things he did care about, he would die for.

Thinking back, it was ridiculous how often we were with each other. Everywhere we went, we were known as ‘Whitney and Nick’. You never had one without the other. Nick often slept over at my house with my brother, so he was literally never more than ten feet away at any given moment.

It’s not far from the truth to say that Nick and I were like Yin and Yang, although who was Yin and who was Yang changed almost daily. In retrospect, I think even out appearances were opposite. Nick would always were black clothes, or dark colors, and I wore light, bright colors. His hair was always disheveled, which made him look like he had just woken up, while I was a bit of a perfectionist. I looked up to Nick, literally. For the longest time I could never look at him at eye level. He was a bit overly confident, but that made him all the more funny. Nick is one of the most facetious people I know, but that might be the one thing about him that never changed. He was the life of the party, and I was always right there with him. You could tell whenever Nick entered the room because he had this air about him, one that I hate admitting has disappeared.

The gravity of our relationship was a force to be reckoned with, or so it was in the beginning. Even if I was wrong, Nick would back me up 100%, and that was all that mattered to me. He brought out the best and worst in me. He was the first one I would run to if I was ever upset; but on the contrary, he was often the one who upset me in the first place.

They say good things come to those who wait. However, what they fail to mention is that those good things are only temporary. I can never be sure what caused it, but the cataclysmic chain of events was something that I never could have prepared for. The excitement and camaraderie that once held us so strong were eroding beneath us. No longer on stable ground, I began to wonder where this tunnel would lead.

I didn’t think it was possible to find one person I could share everything with. It seemed like a fantasy that I could only dream of, but I found a friend in Nick, and despite the falling out, I’m genuinely glad that I met him. He showed me things that others could have only explained. Nick gave me confidence, and now I know that I shouldn’t try to please other people. I also laughed more in those few years than ever before. I never wanted it to end, but the fact that it did made me realize that even the strongest stone can come crumbling down. The friendship may have only lasted four years, but what I took from it will be with me forever.

Fast forward to present day. It hurts. It still stings every time I see him in the halls, or out somewhere. We have mutual friends, so total avoidance isn’t a possibility. Our friendship has been over for a while now, but I still occasionally think about what happened between us. I sometimes wonder that if I knew what I know now, I could have changed the outcome. Yet, as I mull over all the possibilities of what could have happened, I realize that if given the opportunity, I probably wouldn’t change a thing. The aftermath of our separation still lingers everywhere I go. As bad as this experience was, it taught me that all good things eventually come to an end, and I know that I will never again take friendship for granted.





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