My knees are trembling. My heart is banging against my chest begging to escape before I embark on this death sentence. I hear so much noise all at once. My ears are ringing, and I begin to sweat. Children are everywhere, cackling clowns dancing around in front of my face. Are they mad? Their mouths are wide open screaming. Every shriek I hear moves through my skin, bubbling up to my belly and brain. My stomach twists itself into a mangled maze. I make my way up to the plastic seat. The sweat and tears of another before me are still smeared on the headrest. Click! I’m stuck in this torture chair for the next few minutes of my life, an eternity in my mind. Tears welling up in my eyes spill down over my cheeks. Clunk! I hear the metal begin to move around me. With every click creek clunk I hear, this metal contraption raises me higher and higher. Suspended in the air I don’t dare open my eyes. Convulsions are rippling through my skin; my body is rejecting my decision with violence. The hair on the back of my neck is tearing away, trying to escape before the end of this execution. SHWOOSH! I fall, spiraling straight down. The wind whirls around me blurring my vision. My head is knocking and banging side to side. My ears are being smashed against the hard moist plastic. I am screaming with every breath left in my lungs. I feel my throat being shredded with every shriek. Finally my body begins to slow down. Blood is pumping to my head. My mouth is dry. There are tingles tangling their way up through my limbs, and I come to a stop. Silence. Creeeuunk! I am set free. My knees are still trembling, and my heart is still banging, but a smile creeps its way across my face. Laughing now, cackling like the clowns once were, I understand their madness.
May 22, 2009