You couldn't slam me down if you wanted to. I haven't been down in a while. None of this means anything to you. Everything i have ever done was to get your affection. Your approval. You will talk if I am on your path or off of it. So talk. Talk dirty, talk clean. It means nothing anymore. I finally will live for myself. My roller coaster seats are filled with the friend i don't have or maybe the ones in me head :) No vacancy here. So all you can do is stand amongst the crowd. The crowd who's desires i will never fulfill. The crowd of the nine to five workers, the day dreamers, the envious, the boring, the content. Watch me as the friend you have always been. The only thing i am apologizing for, is that i selfishly wanted you to be more. Today, YOU ARE ENOUGH. So take my hand and give it a kiss. Give me away to this world. Let me go. You have to let go of your need to save me. I can only save myself. Its all up to me. I am a go-getter, a rebel, a daring, ruthless fighter. I dream, create, explore and experiment. The only reason i bring disappointment to my crowd of non-believers is because I don't fit their molds. I spill over excessively and seep through the cracks. Perhaps I wasn't meant to. My most happiest of memories are comprised of you. If I didn't have them, I would never know how to love. I owe you my life, now sit back and watch.
October 11, 2011