I write best when my third and sixth dresser drawers are completely open and the fourth is halfway open, when my door is open 3/4 of an inch, when eight pencils are scattered across the floor on 38 degree angles, and when my closet door is 4 3/8 inches away from my radiator. The bottom sheet of my bed is on the floor; the rest are thrown back. My radio has to be on 94.5 and the volume control is on 4. The television has to be on Channel 56. I MUST have 14 articles of clothing on my floor and three remote control cars. My guitar has to be totally under my bed and so do the Twix wrappers, cookie boxes, Coke cans, Sprite bottles, donut crumbs, the half-eaten brownie I ate last month, four popsicle sticks, eight empty glasses and, last but not least, the stale Frosted Flakes. My mother simply MUST be lecturing my sister. n