Magazine, website & books written by teens since 1989

My Hopeless Dream

Custom User Avatar
More by this author
The naïveté was the foundation of my undoing, but at the same time, the way I was ripped apart cleared the path for the drastic changes of my persona. A lyric from “Almost Lover” by A Fine Frenzy: “I’d never want to see you unhappy; I thought you’d want the same for me.” This lyric clearly depicts the unspoken mantra I shared with my former love: I did all I could to see the rare smile that reflected a moment of happiness. Seeing this person unhappy cut into me, a sign of our shared sentiments; after a time, I’d fallen in love, finding that mutual affection. The moment of perfection, of reciprocated love, was just that–for a moment.

What really exasperated me was that I put my heart, soul, mind, and body into loving him only to find that he had a girlfriend. I was led on through kind words, told that I was loved, and I believed him. I truly trusted that everything between the two us was perfect until I uncovered that up until that point, all he had said was a lie, one that tore my ingenuous soul to shreds.

I thought I’d found someone who actually needed me in his life. After leaving an impression on me that was practically a plea for help, I felt compelled to take this person under my wing and bring him above the layers of depression he piled upon himself. I did it because I cared, because I couldn’t stand by while someone in so many pieces, someone who beat himself up over every little thing, continued to stock up on negativity. The next thing I knew, I was severing all ties and saying goodbye. The aforementioned song illustrates just this: “Goodbye, my almost lover; goodbye, my hopeless dream.” What I believed to be unconditional was the complete opposite for I had put so much into a hopeless dream, one I grudgingly admitted would never come true.

Nonetheless, I took a lesson from this, one that Sarah Cohen illustrates well: “Don’t take love, or your loved one, for granted.” I was candid enough to see an open plain stretched out in front of us; after it ended, though, I felt as if I had to struggle to reminisce so that the memories would stay with me, as if I had to strain to see even a sliver of that once open plain. I was cheated and made a fool of, but I cherish these memories because, at one time, I knew nothing else. Though I’ve discarded my feelings for this person, he helped me to be myself and assisted me in finding a confidence I never knew I possessed. I will never take this person for granted again when he carved me, a masterpiece, out of an old willow. This, I believe. I will never dwell on something that can be viewed from its brighter side. This, I believe.

Post a Comment

Be the first to comment on this article!

bRealTime banner ad on the left side
Site Feedback