A Modest Proposal: A Satircal Solution for Police Bruality

November 11, 2016


It is a melancholy object to those of the African American race who have to watch and hear about the many people of their race who are getting shot and murdered by white policemen. This terrible issue is caused by racism and stereotypes against black people. Due to this issue, many families mourn the loss of their loved ones. If this problem is not solved, many decades of racism and murder will continue, and tear the world into shreds.

I think it is agreed by all parties that the life-threatening occurrence of police brutality is getting worse in the United States. Police have killed more than 100 unarmed black people in 2015, nearly twice each week. Anybody who can find an effective way to stop this is noble enough to get their own Stanley Cup.

But my intention is far from being confined to provide only for the betterment of black lives, it will help the community as a whole, bringing us closer together. Everyone will have a role in making the United States a better place to live and call home.

As to my own part, I have studied the proposals of other projectors, and concluded that they are not nearly as efficient as they claim to be. Their simple solutions, such as having the police officers wear body cameras, will not be implemented rapidly enough to combat the already destroying effects of police brutality. I have calculated that in the next 7 years, the black race will be completely wiped out of the United States. I believe that instead of recording an officer’s every move, we should use a more effective method that is socially beneficial.

I will now present my own idea, which I hope will not be subject to any disagreement.

I humbly offer it to public consideration that humankind as a cohesive and cooperative unit, should have a delay on their guns. When they pull the trigger, the gun will not fire until five seconds after the trigger is pulled. That way, the person has a chance to get away before they are shot. Many people will survive because of this.

In this scenario, not one person will die because of a gunshot. They will have plenty of time to escape the officer, and continue to live their life as a free American. No skin shall be penetrated by a painful bullet.

Of course, African Americans  will have to be protected in another way. The gun delay may not always be effective. That means every single African American will be forced to wear a bulletproof vest while out and about. This will decrease the chances even more of them being murdered by police officers.

These drastic and sudden changes to our country may be difficult to enforce, but with enough help from our communities, it will be possible. We will become an inseparable society of racism free people. We will save millions of black lives in the United States.

I can think of no valid objection that may be introduced to antagonize this proposal, unless one states that bulletproof vests will be too costly to purchase for every African American. My solution will override this objection. Bulletproof vests can be bought fairly cheap at places such as Dollar General, Dollar Tree, and Family Dollar.

Again, no one should dare to suggest these notions to me until they have a small spark of hope that these actions may be implemented.

It is not that I do not respect the input of others on the subject of solutions to this topic, but simply that I have spent lightyears researching this topic, and I am certain that my solution is the best, if not the only solution to the problem that is police brutality.

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