Things I Carry

February 25, 2009
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With me I carry many things; not many of them have meaning to me. The most
meaningful thing that I always have with me is my evil eye. Additionally I always carry
carefulness around with me. These are two totally separate things, but to me they mean so
much. I am very into having an evil eye with me because it makes me feel protected from
badness and pain. I also always carry carefulness with me because I believe I must be
cautious and aware of my surroundings. Even though one thing that I always carry with
me is an object and the other is all mental, somehow they interconnect and work for me. I
am very paranoid when I go out because I have heard of so many stories which scare me
and cause me to constantly think about them. Due to the fact that I am like this, I carry
the evil eyes around with me to make me feel safe inside, and I also carry carefulness
with me so I am always attentive to where I am and what I am doing and so that I will
always avoid danger.
I am a little bit of a superstitious person. I will never walk under a ladder, I will
never separate with my friends if we are holding hands and a barrier gets in between us,
and I will never let a black cat cross my path. I am a strong believer in these omens, and
so I always knock on wood, and I try my hardest to never break a mirror. Evil eyes are an
old European belief in which it is said that they ward off the evil spirits. Always having
evil eyes with me makes me feel better inside and allows me to feel secure. I guess you
can say that me carrying something with evil eyes around wherever I go is just me
standing for what I believe.
The other thing that I carry with me is an inanimate object for it is a feeling in
which I keep inside me, but causes me to act the way I do. I walk around with carefulness
in my back pocket. I am constantly thinking about my decisions and how I treat a
situation or react in one. I read so many stories in the newspaper and watch so many on
the news that I could say I have heard about almost everything. This causes me to be very
cautious and aware of what is going on. Carrying carefulness around with me has
changed the course of many of my decisions.
As one can see I carry two important things with me all the time. Even though one
is an animate object since I actually carry it with me, and the other is just metaphorically
there, they join with one another and help me be who I am today. I am a very cautious
person and I care about what I do, and I strive to make the best decisions. But just in case
I err in my judgment, I have a back up for protection.

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