Deserve

By
She slipped into deep depression after his death. The funeral was horrible. She couldn't even stand because her sobs shook her whole body.

The funeral was her fathers. He died at his own hand. She was in the house when the gun went off. She heard the shot ring out throughout the house. She heard his body hit the floor from upstairs. She also heard her step-mother scream.

FLASHBACK

She drifted off not knowing what had happened until later. There was a knock at her door, A police officer walked through the door. By his side was her step-mother. She was not crying. She was not sad. she seemed satisfied.

The officer led her out to his car and put her in the back. She watched the door of the house as a gurney came out of the front door. On it was her father. She watched as something fell off of him. She does not know what it was, but she knew what had happened.

She knew that her father was going to die. She knew what he had done. She screamed and cried hysterically until someone came and took her to a friends.

Her friends name was Kateri. When she got there her friend was asleep. She ate and went to bed in her friends bed.

When she awoke she thought it was a dream until her step-mother came in to wake her up. It was then she realized where she was and what had happened.

There was a knock at the door and her aunt came in. Her brother was at a friends. He had left when her father and step-mother were fighting.

Their aunt picked up her brother and took them somewhere. They were afraid that her step-mother would come after them.

The next day they went to her aunts house. Her mother was there. They received a phone call. The phone call informed her mother that their father had died on the way to the hospital. Her mother turned a look of despair on her face.

Her mother started to cry as she told her babies what had happened.

Her brother sat there. He was only 13 and she was only 9. At first she thought she was hearing things. Then she started to sob. She started screaming. Her brother sat there staring into space. He was not comprehending what had happened.

Soon she fell into a dreamless sleep. She had exhausted herself.

When she awoke she was told that she was going back home to Ohio. She missed the funeral but went back later for a family funeral. This funeral was all of her family member.

Her grandpa sat there staring off into space.

She went up to the coffin and put a flower and a picture in his hand. She said it was so he would have something of her to take with him. The picture was of him and her as a baby.

She started to cry. Her brother was next to her. He was just staring. Not shedding a single tear.He did not cry once for awhile. He became angry and she withdrew.

FLASHBACK OVER

She started to see her father.he would be beckoning for her to come with him. She stopped eating. She wouldn't speak. She cried herself to sleep every night.

She saw him everywhere. In her dreams and on the street. In her room and in the car.

She was mad and sad. He lied to her. He said he was never leaving her. He said he'd always be there.

He caused her so much pain. Caused her brother so much pain. Her brother never dealt with it until 5 years later.

She dealt but it was hard. She thought of him everyday. She'd sleep just so she could see him. Just so she could curse him. She deserved a better father. She deserved a better man to look up to.

She cracked. She was eventually placed in a mental institution. A month later she was released.

She went in and out of depression. Hospitalized many times for attempted suicide. She attempted so many times. Now 7 years later she still cries. She still cries because she deserved so much better than a father that was a coward.

She deserved a father that could face his problems and not take the easy way out. Now she will never have a chance to have a father like that.

She still battles depression. She still faces problems. But she faces them and does not run away. She still lives.

She is strong and will not follow her father. She will not be a coward. She will live her life and move forward. She advises all who face problems to do the same.





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