My mom and dad were married for 11 years. On Christmas Eve they sat me and my brother on the couch down stairs and told us they were separating because they don’t get along well anymore. My brother and I were devastated. I remember looking at my dad; I could see how heart broken he was. For months I would cry and ask my mom to come back but I knew she would never come back; I just didn’t understand. Shockingly my mom got married again to a guy named Robert. Every other week I would go over there; it was a very nice house. He bought me an ATV, and my brother a dirk bike. We would always go to this place called Watkins to ride. I always had a blast! A few years later, on august 9, 2005. My mom, Shawna, passed away from drinking and driving. She was only thirty seven. I was at my best friend’s house, Aleigha. My aunt Darline called her house when I was over there. She told me she was coming to pick me up. When I got to my house, a lot of my family was there and I had no idea why. After awhile my dad called me and my brother into his room, I hesitated. My heart sank. I already knew what he was going to say. I walked into my dad’s room and sat down next to my dad. My brother was on the other side of him. As he started talking my eyes filled up with tears. He told us that my mom had passed away. I and my brother busted out into tears. It literally felt like I had nothing left. I felt all alone. For the longest time I didn’t believe it. Sometimes I would have dreams about her and then wake up thinking she was still alive. I would even wake up crying and wouldn’t know why. I and my mom would always go to star bucks before school. Every ounce in a while my mom would let my sit on her lap and drive around the block about five times. I and my mom would always have fun when we were together. And now that she’s not here it’s really hard to see my self growing up with out her. Ever since I was a little girl I always pictured her planning my wedding and helping me find a house to live in. its weird because a couple moths before she passed away we were talking about how we wonder how heaven really is, like since its peaceful up there and you cant hear them maybe you talked in you mind and the person you were talking to could hear you and respond in the same way. My mom is buried in Arizona. I hate it. The cemetery is out in the middle of no where and all my family that lives out there is old. Soon enough she will be alone and that just crushes me. Im glad that she is in a better place though, its way better than down here. Ill always and forever miss you mom, until that day we meet again. I always remember your face, because it was a face of an angel.
January 26, 2009