My Everlasting Friend

January 20, 2009
By Michael Lee, Culver, IN

People can’t avoid the loss of personal friends and family members because all people die. Three years ago during summer vacation, I received a phone call from my best friend’s girlfriend. “I’m at the hospital. Soo-Young’s car crashed and he is in critical condition.” I was shocked, and I hurried to the hospital. Soo-Young’s girlfriend was sitting on the chair, waiting for results of the operation. A few hours later, the doctor came out. Unfortunately, she and I were given the bad news: My best friend Soo-Young was gone. His girlfriend and I stood there with stunned faces. She began weeping loudly and fell to her knees. Since I could not accept the result, I grabbed the doctor’s collar and pressed him to say he was joking. The worst part was that Soo-Young’s parents were traveling out of the country. It was up to me to make the phone call and convey the tragedy to them.

After the funeral, I felt out of my mind. I panicked, cried aloud and fell into grief. I felt like I was nothing without him, since he was my best friend. Deeply distressed by this grief and pain, I became temporarily unstable, acting abnormally and having problems in returning to my own life. “He is not here anymore; now he is just a precious memory.” I cried all day long and for two months my spirits were low and I lived with no enthusiasm; I was practically dead.
Over time, I realized I gave people occasion to feel anxiety. I decided to make efforts to the grief, but I didn’t know how to lose these feelings of loss and pain. I decided that visiting Soo-Young’s parents and having conversation with them would help me. Soo-Young’s father said, “We feel really badly when we see you these days because you look like a dead person. Think about this. I try to overcome my grief after I lost my son. My whole family tries to smile every time and live normal lives. If you keep struggling yourself and fail to overcome your grief, this also hurts me and my family members. I know how much you liked my son. I know you want to help us out from the sadness, but trust me, we want you to re-enter the world and be a man. That is all we want.” I took his words to heart.
Of course, overcoming the grief was not easy, but I tried to think positively every single moment. Soo-Young didn’t leave me alone. I believe he remains with me, encouraging me, and smiling at me from the sky. He resides in my heart. Soo-Young’s death totally changed my lifestyle. Actually whenever I have a hard time, I remember my friend’s death. Compared to the grief of such a loss, everything else is much easier to overcome. This is how I made up my mind to build my world anew.

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