Tragedy

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A turning point in my life was the day I experienced a tragic death of my father. People say death is ugly and tragic. Well people are right, it is ugly and it tears people a part nobody should have to experience deaths in the family or even friends but, that’s life everybody has to go sometime or at least that’s how I look at it now. When I experienced his death it changed my whole life in many ways, it made me look at things differently and made me cherish every minute I had left on earth, because we are not promised tomorrow.

I choose this topic because it explains why I am the way I am and how little or big things that happen can change your whole life. My father wasn’t always in my life, I barely even knew him but that still didn’t change my love for him. My parents divorced when I was one so he wasn’t in my life for very long. Even after my parents divorced whenever he was in my life I cherished every minute with him.

I didn’t find out that he was dying until I was about 13 or 14. I can remember the day my mom sat all four of us down to tell us about our father like it was yesterday. My oldest brother took it hard but my other brother however was very angry about the whole thing. My sister was sadden by it because she always felt like daddy’s little girl. However I didn’t take it so hard, I didn’t know how to react to it I still felt like I barely knew the man that gave me life, but I was still sad at the fact that he was dying slowly.

After we heard the news about our dad we decided that we wanted to see him and be a part of his life since we didn’t know exactly how long he had. The advice and stuff my dad would tell us probably doesn’t seem right to you or anybody else but it seemed right to us. He would always say to us to never show weakness or to shed tears. Months went by; everything was pretty much a blur a minute by minute waiting to get that phone call that he passed away. We got a phone call from the hospital telling us that my dad was now moved to a hospice.

Now if anybody knows what a hospice is it’s not a place you would want your family member at. A hospice pretty much is where people go to die; I know that sounds horrible but its true. My mother let us go there from time to time and sometimes we stayed the night there which was horrible. I hope nobody would ever have to experience it. I couldn’t tell you the noises I heard in the middle of the night that woke me up. Hearing people crying and screaming about somebody passing away in the night it was the most terrifying thing I have ever had to experience.

I can still remember how his room was set up in the place and what he ate for his last meal stuff like that I carry with me even now. My sister had been the last one to feed him; he loved eating orange sherbert ice cream, which was his favorite. I had been the last one to spend the night with him; I remember sleeping in a chair by his bed and him holding my hand. Then on September 14th 2006 around 4 in the afternoon we got a call telling us that he has passed away.

I went to school that day not knowing of what I was about to hear when I got out. I got picked up by my mom and she didn’t say a word when I got in or when we went to the high school to go pick up my brothers and sister. I then knew the tragic news she was about to tell us.

A tragic turning point in my life happened to be when my father passed away. I was taught a lot by what happened with my father. I now look at things differently; I am a lot more dependent on someone than I ever have been in my life. It doesn’t matter if it’s a friend I am dependent on or a boyfriend, I cherish every moment I have with that person. It also taught me to love freely and trust openly and to never lock away my heart. Love is the strongest medication to me, without love I wouldn’t be the person I am today. If my dad’s death taught me anything it taught me to be open and to let people in even if my father wasn’t like that, it taught me to be like that. If I were to give anybody advice on how to deal with a death it would be to find that special someone you can give your all to and let them in. Don’t hold it all in to yourself, everybody deserves to be loved.





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