Have you ever wondered how it is like to go and live in a country completely different from your Motherland? If no you are lucky, but if yes that means you and me are on the same page and we can understand how it feels like. If you are wondering why I asked this question let me tell you yes I am also one of those who had to leave their motherland and move to another country. I am from India and I moved to America when I was 10 years old. So while I was learning and putting my hand on our cultural values, Traditions, language and etc. While I was getting a flavor of those things I was moved to a land that was completely different from my motherland. So I had to go through a lot of problems and force myself to change so I could blend in to a new world.
After we landed in U.S.A. my brain started to create its illusions and gave a strike of fire to my problems. First illusions it made was that U.S. was in the sky which made me scared. I was already scared on my first step into the new world and as soon as I lift my leg up and put it on the stairs to step out of the airplane I start to feel dizzy while looking down at the stairs . Because somewhere down my cerebrum (the thinking part of the brain), I had a thought that America was in the sky (like I said before) and that’s why we had to fly to get there. So while I was looking down on the stairs I started to feel dizzy and for a minute I was like can I just stay on the airplane because I felt that if I step on the stairs I will fall on the ground. Now days when I think of that illusion I laugh at myself and I also feel dumb because I believed that illusion.
Then a month later came another problem, which made me really uncomfortable in U.S.A. and that was to start school. First we tried to get admitted in New Jersey where we lived with our grandparents. But unfortunately since my English was horrible I was not approved to study in that school. So then I started to learn English at home and meanwhile we moved to Delaware to my aunt’s house. So after another month we tried to get admitted in a school in Delaware. My English was better then before so I was approved. This was a good and a bad news for me, good because I can learn now and bad because I was going to a place where I did not know anyone there and I was really scared to go without my parents.
How did you guys feel on the first day of school? I know whatever you felt like it was not the same as what I felt. Guess what I did on the first day as soon as the school started I sat on my desk and I started to cry in front of the class. Everyone was laughing at me and since I was nervous and with my broken English I wasn’t really able to explain to the teacher why I was crying. I literally cried for the whole school day until I reached home. Every day of the school year would have been a day full of struggle if my elementary school teachers would not have taught me things in a simpler and in way that would make it stick in my head. They helped me every day brought in games that would help me learn things in a fun way. I think that they were tired of me and were angry at me (they didn’t say it to me but I can tell by their face) sometimes because I was annoying them a lot and getting on their nerves, that is what I think they thought about me I don’t know if it is true on not. All I would like to tell them is sorry and thank you.
All i wish is that now I would not have to move and live in a country other than India and America because I do not want to suffer through all the problems again. I also feel that even after a person leaves its motherland and move to another country and live for a long time it still cannot be as comfortable as your motherland. This is what I feel I don’t know if it is true for everyone or not but this is what I feel about this thought. See now I have been in the U.S. for 8 years now but I still am not as comfortable as I would be in India, because I can’t talk in my language to anyone, I can’t make friends easily because some just don’t want to be friends with me even if I try or just because I am a Indian. I say this because I was just in India last year and I went there after 5 or 6 years but I still was able to get along with others quickly and make friends easily and faster and nothing felt new to me it was like I have lived there since I was borned . So this is my opinion I am not forcing anyone to believe it.