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Waiting for What is Already There

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Since I came to Lewisville High, my life has become exceptionally easier. I never thought however, that my love life would include, not Jeremy or stephen, but Michael.

I remember the day we actually sat down and talked. He was waiting on Brad to get there and I was just there, escaping the somewhat pissy mood of April who had thrown her bookbag to the spot we usually sat. WE sat on the hall, across from one another, and that was the first day HE actaully made ME laug. He talked right to me. That was when the crush began. But it was dull and didn't stay around long. After that time however, we did talk more and by the end of the year, were even friends.

Over the summer was when it really all happened. While I was at my Aunt Brenda's in the month of June, we talked through Yahoo Messanger and I learned more about him then I ever thought I would. He was more than I expected and the crush returned, only this time, I found out it was returned.

We remained in contact for the remainer of the month, then some the rest of the summer, then moreso when I got a new computer. He got back with Bridget and I said I wanted to be with Jeremy. But circumstances change and feelings grow, and on the first day of the new school year, we both knew things were different.

11 Days after school started, we finally got what we had thought about for months: each other. It was a bit slow at first, but everything progressed and I knew my life was circling around him, the one person here who really understood me, really knew me. I found the way my electrons and molecules reacted growing in even greater frequencies. And now it is stronger than ever.

We have been together for over a month now, you could say a month and a half, and after taking it slow, I'm where I want to be: In his arms. He's a couple months younger than me, but it's hard to tell because he is taller than me. Age doesn't matter to me. I absolutely love him and always get thrills when he introduces me to someone as "My Girlfriend Judi."

This year I am a senior and he is a sophomore and although my High School experience is coming to a close and his is nearly halfway over, I feel like I've lived more than I have with him. Happiness proves a huge point.

For those of you who think true love is right in front of you, you have no idea how right you are, but also how wrong you are. Whenever you think one person is it, the person who you end up with might be that person's best friend, brother, cousin, or even a new friend. Then it may be someone you have never met before. It hits you hard, and when it does, you know.

Michael is my now. I think of the future, jokingly and seriously with him, but my hopes don't raise as high as they used to. I know now how life can be:unfair but good. I just want now to be now. The future will reveal itself soon.





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