In Her Mind and Heart

October 1, 2008
Nobody knows what goes on in her mind and heart

This is only because from others she is always set apart

She can't stand some of the people who call themselves her friends

cuz for her family and friendship bonds always ends

Though she has given each the chance to be trustworthy

and each one has everytime has made her outlook more blurry

for she yearns to find good in everyone she meets

only to be mocked,hurt,and cast aside in every feat

On the outside she puts effort to have these bonds with others

to be positive,outgoing, and cheery and accept companionship when offered

She dresses in black but only so,she still looks casual

with bright red hair and painted fingernails she typical

shiny,hopeful and hurt her eyes are beautiful

she decorates them with make-up so it blocks her soul

Constatly she hears from the opposite gender

they would go to ends of the earth for her

that sheis most desired and without fault

in all the while this attention becomes her newest fault

She is still insecure and alone in her feelings

yet now is with lustful dealings

for at a young age of 5 her body and innocence was taken

blamed herself for half the time since but all,forsaken

her grandmother seemed to be to blame next

She thought of this experience

everytime she came close to sex

not after long this new found lust is nothing

she no longer cares what happens to her biding

the loss of her pride and innocence her respect is gone

moving on through her trials and tribulations of life for only so long

she feels now the worl owes something to her for this deed

now implanted is a restless and reckless seed

her choices are her own she knows this

only to choose the one more dangerous

Her grandmother was supposed to be taking care of her

then to stupidly leave her witha stranger

the girl blamed herself for letting it happen

then she grew up realizing it wasn't helpin

and that she was too young to know

This tainting incident and tragedy would make her grow

into a trouble dwelling teen

too much underneath to be seen

she had been content so far untill

adolescence would have its will

She grows into a developed body and beautiful face

she wanted to know where it would get her at a rapid pace

Then the summer of her 14th year

every boy in her life seemed to want her near

she was at first flattered by the attention

for she never received it before,only exclution

she had never felt special or important

only forgotten,lost and insignificant

It was all fun and games

untill she met him and he came

into her life and it was over ,she was done

when she knew he felt it too,it was clear he was the one

Dramatically enough at the time she had a boyfriend

he was her age nice cute but scarce so she thought it was ended

had not heard from him in weeks thought it over and finished

eventualy he calls to say goodbye for 2 years with one wish

to see her one last time before he left

she meets him uneasily for she didn't want to do something she'd regret

when they meet and hug he looks good with a mohawk

They were both shy yet glad to be and took a walk

through the flying water while holding hands it was fun

before they knew it the truck was there and he was gone

yes she was going to miss him his name was tim.

And so conludes this part of her and him.

Since then he and her new and first love

must go through many obstacles many pushes and shoves

He who worked for here father wanted her so

she who was overprotected and sheltered wanted him more

For months they would sneak and lie

lasting this long they thought they were sligh

Now here,you see since her new life is fascinating

she wanted to remember it and so she records it in writing

A girl of young age makes a mistake and leaves her book open

her parents have read that she has disobeyed them and become sulken

enough to try to their best to get him arrested

she runs to stay at his brother's house with him together they tested

to see how far they'd go,the next morning compromise

together they go and times goes by their love an incredible size

nothing could possibly come between them

unil 'bout a year and a half later there was trouble between her and him

Understand she be fully faithful many other guys have fallen for our heroin

these were good friends then never heard from again

when it came to a different on who seemed to need her she decided that would end

they befriended each other and would have fun

though remember she was still with and loved her 'one'

time goes by and she learns of something new

this fondness for her becomes love; she doesn't know what to do.

People around them would talk and say there was more

many times she felt guilty having guy friends as if a whore

She was always grateful and glad

for her boyfriend and love was hardly mad

though was not stupid and could tell others wanted his queen

but to continue on with this potential paramour it seemed

that he was already a very sad heart involved in a bad life

He claimed she was his angel of sight

she never had feelings for this poor boy

she could't help but feel terribly guily cuz soon this would destroy

Her boyfriends heart just a lil as time went on

soon he would be the only son

to graduate and go to college

this wouldn't be easy and became a challenge

unfurtanetly he felt abandoned by his girl

while he was working she was in her own world

when finally these two love birds found time

it'd be good and great,then they'd bicker and whine

by the end of her sophmore year it was sad

they regretibly broke up to be only friends and

agreed they were free but both accepted love

was always there and the other was above

all else and everyone

Now they must realize this chapter is done,time for a new one

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