Ever since I was little I had to try to find my own path, my own way. I had no one to look up to, no role model. I always would look at little girls with their mom and dad, they looked so happy. Oh how I wish I would of had that. I wanted to go out to the park with my parents, have a birthday party with ballons and cake and ice-cream. Everyone had that, but no, not me. I was only 6 and if I wanted to go to school I had to walk myself. You see, my mom was an addicited and my dad, well who knows where he was. My mom shot up everyday and never took care of me. I had to watch myself and my two younger brothers. David was one, Tony was three and I was six. We grew up in NorthSide Denver and although many people may not think its tough, it is. I had to wake up feed my brohers and myself if we even had something to eat. Someimes my mom would sell everything we had just for a high. I never understood what made her hate us so much, we were all hers, so she could love and hold, oh how I longed for that. Until this day, I don't remember ever hugging my mother. Anyways, I put my brothers through school and tried my hardest to get them through life with no problems. By the time I was nine I was working to put food on the table, anything I could do for money I'd do it. I made sure my brothers were at school everyday and never needed anything, in that aspect. As you can see this was hard and I ended up leaving school by the time I was in the fourth grade. All David Tony and myself saw was our mother laying on the living room ground with a needle in her arm and a diffrent guy in her bed, everyday. Me and my brothers struggled like no one else I know but I am so glad. I know thing could have been a lot diffrent but everything turned out for he best. My brothers have such beautiful souls. They are independent respectful and kind. They thank me everyday for everything I've done for them and I absoultly love them. I have no education and have been working three jobs since I turned sixteen but now I am trying to get my life back in order and get and education so I can better support my brothers. They are currently in a family members house and I am assisting the Job Corps program to be a Medical Assistant. David is now fourteen and Tony is twelve and they both have 4.0's in school and are involved in many sports. I always believed I could help my brothers out if I tried, and like one of my teachers at Job Corps told me. "What you believe creates your reality." My beliefs created my reality and I wouldn't have it any other way.
August 27, 2008