The Unthinkable

February 3, 2008
By Amanda Zemaitis, Commack, NY

Why is it that everyone seems so fearless in situations like this? They look untouchable with their heads held up high almost godly. Where as I, with my clammy hands and ghostly expression, am always in a corner quivering with fear. Today I would be faced with a challenge far worse then anything I have ever experienced before: riding a roller coaster. Although I am far from dauntless, I will have to muster every bit of bravery inside of me and defeat the giant metal deathtrap I was standing in front of.
My heart was racing at the speed of light as I walked into the seemingly unending amusement park. Without any consent, Anita and Roxanna tugged my forearm and pulled me towards the first roller coaster in sight. I looked up wide eyed at the black and purple giant.
“You ready,” Anita asked with a hint of concern in her voice.
“As ready as I’ll ever be,” I replied in a shaky tone.
I walked up the gum infested steps that led to the line with my head downward still contemplating my decision. To our surprise there was barely any wait due to the expected downpour later that afternoon. As the line of strangers was gradually becoming smaller, my stomach became more uneasy.
Before I knew it Anita, Roxanna and I were about to load onto the next set of seats. As I walked onto the rough metal platform I blocked out the screams of thrill-seeking passengers on roller coasters nearby, all I could hear was my inner voice screaming at my illogical choice. I placed my close to paralyzed body carefully onto the seat and pulled down the safety bar. Multiple visions of me falling off the roller coaster and plunging to my death suddenly came into focus. I started to squeeze Anita’s hand so hard that her knuckles became as white as freshly fallen snow.
Without warning, the roller coaster began to inch slowly up the ramp leading to the highest point. All I could think was don’t look down. My advice to myself didn’t work to well seeing that I glared down about a millisecond after. All I saw was the blades of green grass appearing smaller while I imagined myself advancing higher into the air.
My pulse stopped for the two seconds my seat was suspended in the air. My dangling feet and arms tensed up and my surroundings appeared to have been moving in slow motion. I quickly shut my eyes in hope this would soon be all over.
I felt the strong wind sting my flesh as the seat started downward. Feeling weightless and free I squinted my eyes in hope to boost those emotion. All I could make out were a mush of green and blue coloring. I closed my eyes once more to prevent from becoming dizzy and before I knew it my ride was over.
As I got off the ride a smile spread across my face. Rushed with adrenalin I could hardly stand waiting for Anita and Roxanna to climb out of the seats. I knew I had accomplished my goal and faced my fears of heights and roller coasters. This had always been hard for me, but I had finally done the unthinkable and lived in the moment. Now, I could walk into amusement parks with confidence and courage.

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