I knew this girl, let's call her Amelia we met when we were pretty young. We became the best of friends we were inseperable, like conjoined twins. I told her everything and she said she did the same. The only thing was she had been lying to me for the past 3 years, everything I knew about her was a lie. She self harmed and tried to commit suicide a few time. I was devastated she had such a low self-esteem and resulted to doing the things she did. My whole world came crashing down it's like a part inside of me had died, I was willing to forgive and forget as she meant so much to me and I wanted to help her in the best way I could. To be there for her. Things were great for the next couple of months, like nothing had ever happened but the thing was the girl I once knew was a total stranger. Still I carried on and things were getting better and I was finally happy again. Then one day she stopped talking to me, I was confused. I didn't know what to do. I had finally come to terms with her illness, Anorexia Nervosa. I had done everything i could to help her. I felt like a failure that I had failed at being her best friend. I guess things were never going to get back to normal and they still aren't but I've now met some amazing knew friends. It still get's me down that I'm not friends with Amelia anymore and that I should've made up with her when I had the chance but I guess you have to live with your mistakes...or maybe this whole experience was for the better. But honestly if you have any problems that cause you to self harm like Amelia did don't ever think that you deserve it because trust me no one deserves to suffer, all I ask is that you get some help and any broken relationships may be mended.
The friend I thought I knew
October 3, 2012