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A Proposed Solution to the Obesity Epidemic Affecting Children in the USA
The difficulties of fitting in as a child are further amplified by physical characteristics that set one child apart from others of the same age. When nearly all the children in a school or neighborhood are of a certain weight and height, it makes those of above-average proportions stick out as though they were diseased. If a child of seven reaches the weight of a young bottlenose dolphin, while those around him are, at the largest, the size of an adult porcupine, the dolphin-sized child is bound to suffer embarrassing rejection from those smaller than him. After an early childhood with few friends, it is extremely possible that the child will suffer from social awkwardness by the age of ten. As the large child enters adolescence, a time where socialization is an essential part of brain development, their social skills will be minimal, and depression, or even suicide, is a likely outcome. With obesity lies a future of health problems, and , if isolation doesn't drive the victim to suicide in their teenage years, an early death.
Providing these children with means to lose the weight they put on due to genetics or overeating would greatly improve the lives of both the children and their parents, who suffer at the knowledge that their children will likely lead a short unhappy life.
My intent is to suggest a proposal that will better the lives of the victims of childhood obesity. My reasonably simple idea will not only help the children, but will reduce the weight our country holds in obesity-related health problems. I hope it will be acted upon, or at least, considered thoroughly before it is tossed away, similarly to laws that were once stubbornly thrown out, but today shape our lives as Americans.
Although diet and exercise have been a successful way to lose weight in the past, they require intense self-will, which few young children possess. Besides willpower, the remedy requires exorbitant amounts of time. My simple solution will allow children to lose weight in a much faster and more effective way.
I've been informed by an Italian physician that when a tapeworm becomes lodged in the intestine of a human, the foreign visitor will consume all the food that the person eats. This would block the contents from having a chance to be absorbed into the bloodstream. For young children who have trouble keeping their weight under control, tapeworms are an extremely efficient way to prevent the food they eat from being stored as fat.
By inserting worm larvae into the child's food, the worm would have an easy time getting into the body. Once settled in the intestine, it would be only a matter of days before the worm begins absorbing the foods the child takes in. If properly fed, the child can host quite a large worm. The larger the worm, the faster the child loses the weight. After only a week, the child will begin to show improvement in their weight. As the worm grows and absorbs more fats, the child will begin looking more like those around him. The realization that he will be cured of a lifetime of social isolation is guaranteed to lift his spirits and encourage him to eat more. As long as the child keeps eating, the worm will continue growing. When the parents see the child happy and accepted, the stress they experienced over their offspring will be taken off their shoulders. If more children were exposed to tapeworms and lost large amounts of weight, the number of obesity-related health problems in the country would drop dramatically. The price of health insurance would drop, and more families could become confident about their financial situation. A family with financial and health security is eighty percent more likely to produce confident children, and so by reducing the number of health problems and the price of insurance, the country as a whole would become stronger.
Colleagues of mine, all with work as stressful as my own, have offered a different proposal to ridding the country of obese children. They assure me that exposure to a high stress environment results in weight loss. When under stress, the body has to work much harder, and doesn't have as much food energy to store as fat. So by introducing children into extremely high-stress environments there are certain to be results of weight loss. I wholeheartedly agree with their reasoning, having experienced weight loss due to stress myself. However, the negative affects of stress on the mind also accompany the beneficial weight loss, and exposing young children to such stress would likely endanger their quickly developing brains.
As we have already heard, introducing tapeworms to a child's body in order to decrease their weight would be beneficial to their emotional state. Children who blend in with others of their age are more likely to be popular, and being of average weight will allow a child to look and act like everyone else. Social acceptance is important in early life, and leads to better communication and relationships as an adult. As well as improving the emotional state of the children, having an average-sized child would also improve the mentality of the parents. There is no greater pain than watching one's child suffer. As the child becomes socially accepted, the parents will find joy in seeing them playing happily.
A second benefit to my proposal is that health risks that come with obesity would decrease. Fewer Americans would die every year from diseases like diabetes and strokes if a smaller percentage of the population were obese.
Thirdly, by providing children with tapeworms to absorb the fats they consume, the number of hospital visits would decrease, and the price of health insurance would decrease with it, and more families could enjoy the comforts of living in financial security. With more financially confidant families, more confidant children are produced. The country's economy, as well as its people, would become stronger.
Although I can't imagine many oppositions to my proposal will arise, I'll simplify the search by addressing one possible objection that may come up as my idea is considered. It may be offered that by introducing children to the ease at which tapeworms can decrease their weight, they make take advantage of their situation and decrease their weight to a number far below what is average. Simply put, the tapeworms may contribute to the creation of a new type of anorexia, where children continue to let the tapeworm grow, until it becomes so large that it begins to consume every morsel of food the child eats. If this were to happen, the child would continue to lose weight until health problems arose and a doctor was alerted to the situation. However, this potential problem can be easily remedied by making sure each child is under the proper care of a doctor as they go through their weight loss. This doctor will weigh and observe the child every one-to-three weeks, and if the weight changes to what is considered too far below normal, the doctor will prescribe medication to destroy the worm, in order to keep the child from taking advantage of its presence.
I am not opposed to other solutions, such as free “fat camps,” that would allow children to lose weight in the vicinity of other children with the same problem, but, as previously stated, the process of diet and exercise is extremely time-consuming and requires willpower that few children possess.
To conclude my proposal, I wish to thoroughly discourage any readers who believe I am presenting my ideas to solely benefit myself. I myself am not overweight, nor do I have any obese family members that could possibly be helped by the benefits tapeworms have to offer. Although the benefits of a stronger and more economically secure country are certainly appealing, they affect not only me, but the whole nation.