Why Me? This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine.

August 4, 2011
I woke up and it seemed like an ordinary day. When I went to school, it seemed like another boring day.

Then my principal came to my class to get me; the sound of her heels, the silence inside the room, the sound of thunder in my ears. I felt uneasy tension slip through me.

I remember her walking in the room, the long shadow cast behind her. She asked me very nicely to come with her. I could feel the tension in the pit of my stomach, the fear washing through me, my face burning red.

My mind raced through all the things I’d done recently. Was it the time I skipped class or maybe when I pushed Katie down in the snow? I walked down the hall on this bright sunny day thinking, I must be in deep this time.

Then I saw my brother standing in front of the doors, staring into space. His face was set in a grimace. My heart skipped a beat.

My brother, my other half, the one person I looked up to, was standing in front of me, telling my principal something I couldn’t understand. At that moment, I saw pain, concern, fear and tension build in his eyes. I realized it wasn’t something I did, but something worse. I wanted to know why my brother was there and not my mom. I wanted to know what was so awful that everyone went through all this trouble instead of just waiting until I got home. Yet I was terrified of the answer.

I couldn’t ask because the lump was getting bigger in my throat. My tongue was tied, my mouth dry and everything began spinning.

Then my brother told me, “We’re leaving.”

As we walked out to the car, I realized that my brother had ridden with Mista and Mike, my mom’s best friends. I began to panic and slipped into hysteria. We got into the back seat and my brother put his arm around me and told me our mother had been in a car accident. I didn’t understand.

Was she at the hospital, was she in critical condition, a coma, or …?

I tried to ask but the words would not emerge. My brother pulled me closer. As reality hit me, I asked, “Is she okay?” In a voice full of sorrow, heart-ache and grief, he told me she wasn’t all right. All my anger and emotions welled up inside. Then he lifted my head up and told me, “She was hit by a truck; her car was crushed.”

I did not know how to react, so I sat there in silence, staring out the window. When we pulled into my driveway, it hit me.

I would never see my mother again. One day everything is there and the next an incident of unbelievable tragedy – a person’s life changes in the death of a heartbeat.

This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. This piece has been published in Teen Ink’s monthly print magazine.

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AlaskaBoy907 said...
Jan. 4, 2012 at 2:38 pm
im really sorry, i know how it feels to lose someone
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