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Have you loved somone but then hate them for the horrible stuff they did to you. When i was 7 almost 8 my dad conmited suicide, he thought everyone would be better off without him. It has been six years and during this time i have watched my family get along without him. my mom is my hero; she had no idea how to run the meat market my dad owned...she didnt even know how to pay a bill! my older sisters were so stong and helped me and my two younger siblings.
i remember seeing my mom and dad get in fights and my dad yell at my older sisters. one night i was in my room, which i shared with my little siblings, when we heard yelling; my dad grabed a bag full of clothes and went to a hotel.
the next morning my mom need some meat, he owned a meat market, so my oldest sister took me with her. i walked in and saw him sitting in his office thinking.
"daddy!" i yelled excided
"hi hannah!" he said letting me sit on his lap.
"are you coming home to watch survior!" we would watch that show every night..together.
"no i have some work to finish"
my older sister walked into the office giving my dad a mean look and took back home. we ate dinner without him and went to bed with no fights that night.
i woke up the next morning and wanted to go play with my friends, who lived two blocks away, with my little sister.
when we got there we played barbies and house with her older brothers for a couple of hours when the mom got a phone call.
"hannah, maddie come here" she said, we walked to the front door and she had our stuff waiting for us.
"you guys need to go home, we will walk you"
we walked home in the snow and saw a bunch of cars around the house and people standing every where! we were led up stairs to my moms room where her and my older sisters were crying.
my uncle and aunt were trying to comfort them as much as they could.
when my mom saw us she said...
"come here you guys" we hoped onto the bed and waiting in her arms.
"you guys daddy is dead"
we sat there for a minute without anything so say.
"daddy who" maddie asked
my poor little at only six years old couldnt understand why God would let that happen to our dad.
"you joking right" i asked with tears running down my face.
i burried my face in my sisters chest trying to find comfort.
that day all our lifes change just because my dad thought he should die.
he left a beautiful young wife, four yougn daughters and a very little baby boy. why would a parent comit to something like a family then give up! how could he just leave us! not want to see my sisters graduate collage and move out of the house, not want to see me start jr. high! he left a poor little boy without a dad, he doesnt remeber anything of him.
after that one little thing my dad had to pull he put a lable on us for life.
in our area we are nown as the family who husban killed himself in his own meat market, my mom became a widow at 38 they were married for only 19 years.
i loved my dad but i hate him so much, i dont miss him at all since i dont remeber anything untle after his death.
God bless anyone who has the same situation!