April Fools!

April 1, 2008
April Fools Day is a day of mischief, a day to be sneaky and deceiving, and an ideal day to pull the ultimate joke on your significant other. So, when the first of April rolled around, I set my mind to concocting the perfect prank for my boyfriend, Bryan. I wanted today to be the one day I pull off a joke so clever that he and I would remember it for years to come.

I am not a person known for playing jokes on people, especially Bryan, because I can never seem to come up with an idea worthy of consideration. Bryan knew this, of course, so he did not expect anything that day. However, creativity was on my side as the idea for the perfect prank came to me that sunny Sunday morning. It would be harmless of course because no one should be hurt when they are the target of a joke, but it would be unexpected, shocking, and sure to make him squirm with uneasiness. Bryan was about to experience a car theft.

There is nothing in this world Bryan is more passionate about than cars. He lives and breathes cars. If they made an edible sandwich out of car parts I bet he would eat it. And there is nothing Bryan loves more than his own car whether it is a junky old Geo or a brand new Ford Mustang. That is why I chose to steal his car. I wanted to get a good reaction out of him and I knew this was the only way to do it without causing any harm. What would Bryan do if someone stole his car? I was about to find out that day.

Once I decided to steal Bryan's car, I had to figure out how exactly I was going to do it. Shuffling idea after idea through my mind only led to the ideas being tossed out. Could I take his keys off his lanyard while he isn't paying attention? No, I've tried that before, I'm not sneaky enough. Can I somehow manage to slip his entire lanyard out of his pocket, and then return it smoothly when I was done? Possibly but it might be too noticeable. What to do, what to do? Suddenly, the answer was right in front of my face! My mind whirred into action then, piecing together every part of my devilish plan. I knew exactly what I must do.

Late that morning after I had the whole plan figured out I text-messaged Bryan and asked him if he wanted to see a movie at Tinseltown that evening after he got off work. Bryan was to work that day at Target from 12:00 pm to 7:00 pm and Tinseltown was conveniently located in the same shopping center as Target. He responded to my text message with a positive answer, so I told him the movie and the time. He agreed to meet me after he got off work at Books-a-Million (which also happened to be in the same shopping center). As I typed a message back to him wishing him a good day I found it impossible to hide the grin on my face as I thought of what he would experience that evening.

Once I was sure Bryan was at work I called his house. Some help would be needed from his family in order to pull the prank off successfully. His mother answered the phone. After explaining to her what I was going to do that evening, she confirmed that she had the missing part: spare keys for the car's doors and ignition. She said she'd be happy to let me borrow them, and I assured her that Bryan would return them to her that evening. I thanked her immensely and hung up the phone.

Excitement started to grow as the hours passed by. I could not relax when it came time to leave and go pick up the keys. Rushing out the door, I jumped into my truck and sped over to his house. His brother answered the door after I knocked, and he handed me the two silver keys on a little ring. Apparently, his mother was not home.

"Did she tell you what I'm going to do?" I inquired of him.

"Yeah," he said with a laugh. "You're so evil."

"I know! It's going to be so awesome!" I responded excitedly. I thanked him quickly, and then hopped back into my truck and drove to the shopping center at which Bryan worked.

Thankfully, I had left twenty minutes early, so I had time to make sure the keys worked. I did not want anything to hinder my success that night. Scanning Target's parking lot as I parked the truck, I did not see any sign of Bryan outside. If he was pushing carts, he would have surely seen me, and I would have not gotten to test the keys. Feeling assured, I stepped out of the truck and made my way over to my boyfriend's white Dodge Avenger. The door unlocked with the first key. The second key succeeded in starting the car. Now that I was positive that my prank would go through smoothly, I locked the Avenger, and drove my truck over to Books-a-Million to pass some time.

I mindlessly scanned the book selection until Bryan joined me twenty minutes later. While we chatted, I was sure not to mention the date. I did not want my boyfriend on his guard for pranks. He had to be caught totally unaware for the joke to be perfect. After some light conversation, we hopped into his car, leaving my truck there and he drove us to the movie theater, which was one parking lot away from Books-a-Million. My truck's position would come in handy later.

During the movie, I tried my best to sit still. I was bubbling over with excitement, and it made me fidgety. Deep breaths calmed my nerves enough so I would not draw attention to myself. Impatiently, I waited for the middle of the movie, when I could be sure Bryan was totally engrossed in the plot and not likely to be aware of the minor details of my actions. Finally, that time rolled around. I excused myself to the restroom. Outside the theater showing our movie, I broke into a jog and left the building, mentioning to the usher in front that I had forgotten something in my car and that I would be right back. Outside the building, I exploded into an energized run. I needed to burn off some of the energy that had been building up inside me for the last few hours, and it was crucial that I got back to my seat before Bryan started wondering about me. Pulling the spare keys from my pocket, I ran to his car, unlocked it, and jumped in the driver's seat. The engine turned over quickly and I backed the Avenger out of the parking spot. As soon as I was clear from the spot, I slipped the transmission into Drive, and drove the car over to the Books-a-Million parking lot, where I parked it right next to my F250. I then got out, locked the door, and ran back to Tinseltown. Once inside, on the other hand, I had to slow down to a walk. I was not sure how I was going to explain to Bryan my lack of breath after using the restroom, so once my heart stopped racing and my breath became even, I found my way back to my seat. Bryan made no indication that he had been wondering where I was, so I easily settled back into his arms to enjoy the rest of the movie, a mischievous smirk across my face.

The movie finally ended, but I secretly knew the night was just beginning. I could hardly contain myself as we walked outside into the parking lot, but somehow I managed to act normal. With his arm around my shoulders and my arm around his waist, we wandered around the parking lot enjoying the night air. I kept the conversation light, trying to steer his focus away from his car. We talked about the movie, about the night; he made comments about certain cars we strolled by, all the while searching for his vehicle. A good three minutes passed before I noticed he was becoming concerned. I watched this transition carefully, enjoying every minuscule detail. The way his eyebrows furrowed, how the corners of his mouth turned down, the way his eyes searched frantically around the parking lot; each made my chest swell with pride. The butterflies went ballistic in my stomach. I'm really getting away with this, I thought to myself.

"Where the heck did I park my car?" he wondered aloud.

"Um," I said as sincerely as possible, "I really don't know. You know me; I don't pay attention to things like that." He removed his arm from my shoulders and took my hand instead, as if to enable him to search harder and wider. I watched his eyes linger on the vehicle we had parked next to.

"I swear I parked next to this car," he said matter-of-factly. He stepped into the spot right next to the car. "This is where I parked! I know it!" I forced my face to look truly concerned, but he was not paying attention to me any longer. His focus was now entirely on his missing car.

"Who would want to take my car? It's a piece of crap. Besides, there was nothing in it to take."

"Did you leave your windows open? What about the sunroof? You locked the door, right?" I asked him. Inside, his reaction was tickling me. It was going wonderfully!

"No, none of that. Well, wait a minute, I left the sunroof open. Who would go to the trouble of getting in a car through a sunroof and trying to hotwire a car in order to steal it? Especially mine, who would take my car?" Because he was asking the same questions over and over it was apparent he was starting to get upset. Anxiety and anger became plain on his face. He could not believe someone would steal his car. This tickled me even more.

"Do you think it was towed?" I asked him.

"Why would it get towed? That’s stupid. What the hell is going on here?" he said angrily. His steps became faster as he dragged me around the whole lot, checking everywhere, and still there was no sign of his vehicle. His anger was getting worse, and I decided it was the perfect time to show him his car. I tugged on his hand and asked him to come to my truck so we could sit down and talk. He reluctantly agreed, and I dragged him towards the parking lot where his precious car was parked. Suddenly, my arm was jerked back. I whirled around to see Bryan staring at his car, eyes wide and jaw dropped.

"How the . . . ?" Before he could finish his sentence, I completely lost it. I doubled over as my sides ripped with laughter. It was perfect! Everything was perfect! I looked at the priceless expression on his face. He appeared very unsure of what was happening, and almost scared of his hysterical girlfriend. His look could have convinced anyone that I was insane. But his expression only made it worse. My laughter burst out of me in heaves. I clutched my sides as if to hold them together, for I was sure to explode if I did not. The only thing I could manage to do while laughing so hard was pull the spares out of my pocket and say, "April Fools!"

"Uh. . . .What?" He managed to say. Smiling, but still obviously without a clue, he stared at me some more. I managed to pull myself up and regain my composure enough to explain what had just happened to him. Once I was finished and he had discovered what had really occurred he said, "If you had been anyone else, I would have knocked you out." I knew he was only joking. My joke only riled him up a little bit, but there was no harm done. Perhaps the best aspect of my prank was I knew it would become a memory that he and I would remember and cherish forever. With that thought, I wrapped my arms around him and kissed him, then said, "I just pulled off the best April Fools Day prank ever. Aren't you proud of me?" He only looked at me and laughed at my innocent face knowing that because my prank was clever, but most importantly harmless, it was indeed the perfect “April Fools!”

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This article has 2 comments. Post your own now!

celeste rocks said...
Apr. 2, 2011 at 10:50 pm
dam .nice!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
123cum2me said...
Apr. 2, 2011 at 10:06 pm
awesome prank!!!!! cant beileve u pulled it off u r truly awesome.
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