Who Wants Me?

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Your world as you knew it is ripped away, right out from under your feet. Imagine your four years old and after the countless sleepless nights of not knowing where you are or whose bed you’re in, and being identified by a plastic bracelet on your arm, are supposed to become final. This is the family you’re supposed to live with the rest of your life, however long that is. None of those families wanted you, supposedly these people do.

Your Grandma cant take care of you, one of your aunts already has three kids, your uncle, after being falsely accused, is in jail, your other aunt cant take care of you. Who would want a four year old girl and a five year old boy? Scared and alone, the girl relies on the boy for protection, as her only father figure. For her father doesn’t even know her. Yes, he has been there but not for her, he’s in and out of jail, has a new girlfriend each week, and likes his son better, because the marriage was already over by the time the girl was born. Not to mention the bruises on her mothers arms. The mother, although she loves her kids, she physically can’t take care of them. She is in and out of the hospital for medical reason. She wishes she could take them away and care for them like she should, but its impossible.

Remember that night that she was sick. You were three and your brother was four. It was pitch black, probably eleven at night, and she says she needs the doctor. You stand in awe and watch as your brother calls 911, you don’t know how he did it, but he did. “Come on!” he says as he takes your hand and you both run out the door. Down the stairs you go, around and around. The top floor is four stories high. Reaching the ground you run to the entrance of the complex, standing, waiting, holding his hand because you’re afraid of the dark. Finally! You see flashing lights of red and yellow off in the distance. You both start to jump and wave, how could they find two little kids, but they do. Remember, it’s all a blur after that.

So this couple your meeting today might become your new family. You sit, curled up in your mothers’ arms, eating a tootsie role pop, watching, watching these people. They seem nice, they don’t live to far away, and you’d still be able to see your family. The conference goes on and on. Talking, listening, contemplating, you really don’t know what to think right now. “Lets go to the park!” they say. Leaving your mom behind, walking close to the only connection you have to that family, you go to the park. Surprisingly the trip is fun. You like these people, there nice and they seem to like you. It should be o.k.

The days over now, heading home, you think about everything that has happened so far. Your father or lack there of, your loving mother, your best friend- your brother, your family and all they’ve done for you. Where are you going? But no need to worry, your only four, this isn’t your problem to figure out. Content with it all at the moment, you fall asleep. Wishing it would all go away and wondering what tomorrow will bring.





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