In the dictionary under the word optimistic you see the definition: tending to take a hopeful and positive view of future outcomes. Next to that definition should be a picture of myself or my own name because I view everything that pertains to life in an optimistic way. This became a habit of mine a while ago. But before I adopted this new way of thinking I was quite pessimistic. Whenever something negative happened in my life, my mood would change significantly. For instance, if I was placed in a challenging situation, or if I did not get my way with my parents, or even if I did horribly on a test I would feel as if the world would soon crash and burn. One of the biggest issues that I have had to deal with occurred on July 14th, 2005. I was at a friend’s birthday party having a good time and relaxing with my friends. All of a sudden I noticed a guy I have never really noticed before. He had blonde hair, blue eyes and a hilarious personality. Instantaneously I fell for him. We talked that night and my feelings grew stronger. Only issue was that he had a girlfriend at the time. So he was basically “playing” me. When a close friend broke the news to me about him having a girlfriend my world collapsed and my heart shattered. I had never felt so broken up inside. But I pushed everything to the side and focused on the positive things, such as my family, my friend and exciting plans that I created for the summer. My junior year started and I was ready to start of the brand new year on a positive note. Not knowing I would revisit my past. That November, my some what “summer fling” “Daniel,” came up to me and maturely apologized. I believe in second chances and was quick to give him one. We started talking once again and our feelings got involved. This time I made sure he was single and had no other attachments. I also made sure not to get too involved and to protect myself before any one else. Despite all my precautions; however, they would not save me from a broken heart. As soon as everything was going as expected he called my phone and explained that he was still “in love” with his ex girlfriend. Without even realizing it my face was covered in tears. I managed to speak back without a stuttered because I did not want to give him the satisfaction of breaking my heart once more. Ultimately, he went back out with his old flame as I cried myself to sleep every night. I could not eat, I could not sleep and I did not live my normal life. I was torn up, angry, broken, hurt, confused and crushed all at the same time. I let someone get the best of me and that is something that should never happen. I am glad; however, that I went through what I went through because it taught me a lot of things that I would have never learned without getting my heart broken. I now deal with my relationships in a whole different way by not letting my guard down so quickly. I have also become smarter about the lame excuses guys would give a female such as, “it’s me not you” or “I am focused on you not my ex.” It is hard for me to trust someone but I love that about myself, because I finally can look out for me. It took me a while to get over the ordeal but once I did, I realized how wasteful I was with my time. I no longer wanted to feel sad or hurt by this issue or any other everyday issue because no matter how much I cry, the situation would still remain the same. After my experience, I transformed my outlook on life. I became a firm believer of the famous quotes “everything happens for a reason,” as well as “what is meant to be will be.” In addition to the mottos that I live my life by, I also believe that God puts us in challenging situations to simply strengthen our spirit and soul. Now as I live my life, I always remember that life is too priceless and too short to worry about the little things. However when I do have my bad days, I can not help but read one of my favorite quotes to get me back in gear. The quote is the following: Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regret, so love the people who treat you right and forget the ones that do not and believe that everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance take it. If it changes your life, let it. Nobody said that it would be easy, they just promised it would be worth it.
November 15, 2007