Endless. Light green. Deep and spiraling and never-ending. Being lost in your eyes is like a maze with high stone walls and no way out. I feel lost. Blocked, dead almost. But I’m not. Losing you is like dying. Talk to me. Let me hear your voice, how does it sound? Let me see your face happy, not un-sure and innocent and sad and mad and-and-and. Everything. Why do you do this to me? You look at me like your saying ‘I’m sorry’ but you never actually say it. Say it. Out loud. I miss you. I miss your jokes and laughter, all the conversations and memories that are ingrained in my mind because every night in bed I replay them in my mind.
What happened to the days where we were so happy together? All the laughing and talking and memories being made every minute, every second we spent any time together. You changed, I didn’t. Why did you change? I miss you the old you. The old you that was comfortable around me and talked to me. Not all this crap. All this crap that means breaking my heart in two over and over and over. I still don’t understand why I still love you. After all this. You know what? You better know your freaking special. Because you are.