Why am I socially Awkward? | Teen Ink

Why am I socially Awkward?

January 12, 2010
By alexa_elizabeth BRONZE, Houston, Texas
alexa_elizabeth BRONZE, Houston, Texas
4 articles 0 photos 0 comments

Why am I always so lonely? If that is a question you ask yourself, then there might be a solution. Teens across the world are addicted to their phones, music players, and the internet. They spend all their time using these devices so much that it becomes a big part of their life. New, better, and more advanced technology is being invented so fast. Although our world is technologically improving, technology causes our social skills and interaction with others to plummet.
This decade, new and more advanced technology has been created like the speed of light. Everyday there are new inventions in the making. They are manufactured to please the user and to make our lives easier. Instead, the new cell phones and IPods are making our lives worse. We get addicted to such a thing so fast and we suffer the long-term consequences. Neil Postman argues, “though new technologies may be a solution to the learning of ‘subjects’, they work against the learning of what are called ‘social values’ (1). By being addicted to a cell phone or the internet, we are missing out on real relationships that we could be having with people. Spending too much time on an internet site or texting is hurting our social values. We are missing out on a face-to-face conversation that could have taken place if we would not have been so distracted. Eventually, what forms, is an online relationship. You get so used to talking to people online where you do not have to face them, and when you do face them, you can not have a conversation with them because it is to awkward.
Not only does technology invade in your relationships with your friends, it also disconnects you from your family. People who use the internet spend less time with their family everyday. It is simply not worth it to break a great family relationship just so you can have an online relationship. Children everywhere text their friends while sitting at the dinner table when they should be spending family time. This causes tension between a family relationship, and it is rude. When you are with your family, you should not be texting or on the computer because you are wasting valuable time with them that you might not have one day and you will regret that you had not spent time with them. In an article, “The Impact of Internet use on Sociability: Time-Diary Findings”, a study was conducted of the differences between an internet user and a non-internet user. A non internet user spends about two hundred and eighty-seven minutes per day with their family, while a non internet user spends a measly amount of one hundred and eighty-five minutes per day with their family (Norman Nie). A non internet user is more sociable and is less sociably awkward then an internet user.
The basic definition of headphones is, leave me alone or do not bother me. When you are in the car or walking around school and you see someone that has headphones in their ears, then they want to be left alone. The problem with this is that they are isolating themselves from the world. They are being stuck in a world of music, and only music. The constant playing of music causes teens to become distant with people. Many teens listen to their music to avoid real conversations or to escape from the world for a short time. In reality, they do not know what to do when reality sets it because they are so used to being shut off from the world. Most people will not be able to create real friendships because they are so used to just being with their music. With all of the music constantly in their ears, “Interaction between individuals is slowly diminishing as people turn to their technological devices instead of attempting to make new acquaintance or simply experience the ‘natural’ sights and sounds around them” (Song 1). You eventually become so used to listening to music that you might not know what its like to not have your earphones in all the time. You create this relationship with your music player and you turn to music when you are feeling lonely or sad, but if you only turn to your music instead of family or friends, then you are making your situation worse.
The other side to the argument might argue that being addicted to your cell phone and your internet is a bad thing. Although you are creating online relationships, it is not bad for you to have those. Online relationships may make you feel better about yourself. If you do not have that many friends at school, then talking to people on the internet may be a relief. Talking on the internet may give you “openness, self confidence, and a greater sense of ease and comfort dealing with others.” (Coget 1).
The internet takes away family time and it also makes it harder for face-to-face conversations. Although, Jean- Fransois Coget believes that many teens that use the internet a lot and talk on their phone a lot still are very family involved. Just because you text many times throughout the day, it does not necessarily mean that you do not spend time with your family too. You can be doing both, listening to your family and texting your friends. How can you carry on a real relationship with your family if you never only talk to them without having your phone by your side? The internet also makes it harder for you to keep on going relationships with someone if you never see them. Coget thinks “the internet can make it easier for you to keep in touch with friends” (1). He also believes that the internet is a great way to meet tons of new friends easily.
IPods are a world wide used device that plays any type of music that you want at the touch of a button. The problem with them is that they cause many people to become distant from the world and almost create their own world. Kelly Doyle-Mace, a student at the University of Georgia “is willing to sacrifice some degree of social interaction to achieve this effect” (Harris 1). IPods can unite people together so that they can listen to music together. IPods do not make relationships worse because they could bring people together if they have the same music interest and like the same music.
Technology is getting more and more advanced and our social skills are getting worse and worse. Even though technology is a big part of our lives, we are not helping ourselves by becoming addicted to them and letting our social skills diminish. Technology continues to make our relationships awkward and makes us socially inept.


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