Abuse, Lies, and Rape

June 2, 2009
By Anonymous

The house was quiet. Then I heard a big bang on my door. I went over to the door. He stood there with two of his friends. They smelled like old spice, weed and hair spray. I invited them in and I sat on the couch. I felt uncomfortable with his friends there.

The next thing I know I was laying on the tan, fuzzy carpet, one of his friends held my hands down and the other friend held down my feet. They wouldn’t let me up. I struggled and struggled. I couldn’t get up.

Then he came over and he pulled off my red shirt. He pulled off my pants. He took is pants off. He started to rape me. I laid there. I screamed and cried. But he wouldn’t stop. I knew I couldn’t stop him either. It was three against one. It seemed like a long time before he stopped.

I couldn’t breathe. I was so scared that I had been shaking. I cried hard. Black tears ran down my face. He hit me and yelled at me. I thought to myself “What could I have done to make him do this to me?” He told me to put my clothes on. I slowly walked over to my clothes that laid by the stairs.

His friends just left. He looked at me. He smiled and said, “I love you babe.” He leaned over to me and tried to kiss me. I pushed him away and with anger and sorrow in my voice I said “Get out of my house. I don’t love you.” He gave me a look and in his deep brown eyes I could tell he was mad. He raised his right hand made it into a fist and punched me.

About two hours later my mom came home. I was upstairs in my bed sleeping. She woke me up and said “Why do you have bruises? And why do you have black stuff on your face?” I gave her a blank look. Then I said “Its nothing. I just fell down the stairs, and I hit my cheek on the table and it hurt so I cried.” She believed me.

I couldn’t believe it. I just bold face lied to my mother. I felt so bad I thought that the truth was going to come out. But it didn’t. I wouldn’t tell her. I wouldn’t tell anyone. I cared about him so much I was willing to keep it a secret. Even though he hurt me I still loved him. I hated myself for it too.

The next day I was supposed to go to a beautiful picnic at the park. Blue skies, my hair would blow in the wind, but he ruined that for me. I wouldn’t step outside. It was because where he hit me. On my right cheek bone, it was swollen, blue, black, and purple. All I could do was think of his voice saying, “I love you babe. I will never hurt you.” He lied to me. He hurt me and I will never forgive him for it. He lost me in his life. No matter what he says to me I will never go back to him.

I haven’t seen or talked to him since it happened. I still haven’t told anyone either. I wanted to, but I just couldn’t or can’t. I loved and cared about him. He was my life at the time. I wouldn’t do anything to ruin his.

I moved far away from that house and him now. I have I better life. I am happy and the person I’m with loves me. He cares about me. I know for a fact he will never let anything happen to me. But no one knows the future for sure, now do they?

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This article has 1 comment.

dramaqu said...
on Oct. 19 2009 at 7:28 pm
thats so sad i hope u feel better

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