Holding him in my small hands, him wrapped in blankets, I couldn't stop smiling. But my mom
wouldn't stop crying. Tears of joy, maybe? I was little, I didn't understand he was taken away.
I didn't know his small hands couldn't move. I didn't know his little eyes held no life, I
didn't know anything. All I know. I was so happy to have a baby brother. After I started to
understand, that I'd never be able to take him to school, never tell him advice, never play at
school with him, I'd never hear his life, see him smile, see him cry. Never. I started to angry.
Someone took my baby brother. How could someone take life from someone who hasn't done anything
wrong? How could someone hurt my mother to where she couldn't get out of bed, and couldn't eat,
started using pills to cope with her pain. I saw my dad cry. He was so strong. This broke him. Made
his heart stone. Made him cold. Our family was broken. Broken and cold. I barely had a mom. She was
withered away. Empty. Not there anymore. Everyone all ways talks about their childhood like it was
gold, when I can barely remember mine, because I try to fade it out, black it out, so I never have
to look back. Never have to remember the what if's. I miss you Logan, I miss what we could have
had. I wonder what you'd be like. You're all ways with us, remember that. I'll never keep you
out of my heart. Forever you'll stay there, you're small hands, soft skin, beautiful blues eyes,
full of life, smiling, and playing. Sometimes I still get angry, still get confused, and ask why you
left, ask why God took you away. I want to look you in your blue eyes, and tell you that I love you.
Will I ever get the chance?