Feb. 24, 2009

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It's not worth it; Jesus loves me. It's not worth it; Jesus loves me. If I keep writting it, I;ll believe it soon, right? I know Jesus loves me. But is it worth it? Is some stupid little boy worth it? No. How do I know he's not worth the pain, yet I still feel it? He doesn't even acknowledge me anymore. A few weeks ago, I'd at least get a "hey," "later." Now what do I get? Nada. I don't deserve it. I never did anything to him. Ever. Shawn promises it will get better, but will it? It's been over a month. You think I, being my happy-go-lucky self, would be perfectly fine now. That's not happening though. I have this anxious feeling non-stop. When I hear my friends, or anyone for that matter, say his name, my heart drops. Still. I'm putting it all in God's hands, I am. In the bible, it says to pray without seasing, and I've been doing just that. I might be being selfish though. God doesn't like that, does He? Focusing on anything is becoming harder and more difficult each day. ADD? I think not. Broken heart? I think so.





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