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Flood of Thoughts

My dream. A dream that many others share with me, yet only a select four point eight percent get accepted. It’s my dream to get into Stanford University, yet it seems as if my chances are as miniscule as taking a pinch of salt from a jar that is full to the rim. Most who apply have a fair game to get in as everyone has a high gpa, near perfect SAT score, numerous extracurricular activities, and admirable essays. Only those who are lucky are accepted into this prestigious college.


My thoughts are positive for a short period of time, imagining the endless possibilities of myself walking, breathing, and learning there. I want to be enveloped into that environment with others who are just as eager to learn as I am, but my mind promptly shifts to the land of negativity.


I doubt that I’m capable of getting into this college because I’m not a genius and I see many others filled with a busy schedule leaving no wiggle room. I simply have a good gpa and participate in cross country and track and field. Others fill their schedules with three sports, make the varsity team, have six ap classes, are leaders of several extracurricular activities, complete many community service hours, and still manage to have an outstanding gpa. I no longer feel proud of myself, rather, I downgrade myself and my mind floods with a mixture of jealousy as well as resentment for not being such a successful person as they are. I try to put an end to these emotions, but they break through the dams and they overwhelm me in an instant. All these others I see are literally Renaissance people as they master in a wide range of subjects, like Leonardo da Vinci being an inventor, artist, mathematician, and a writer. They also have Einstein’s brain for having the mental capability of quickly grasping a subject. I compare myself with such incredible people, and I see my chances slowly dissipating into the horizon. There’s so much competition it feels as if I were thrown into a boxing ring and the last one standing is the person who gets accepted. The one question that stays in my mind is how do I compete with such brilliant people? Well, the answer is to completely forget about them.


These emotions constantly loom over me causing me to be stressed. It’s an unhealthy state to be in because later on, serious health issues may arise. The expectations I pile onto myself are plentiful yet I try to keep in mind that worrying about these dreams isn’t the solution. The solution is to not worry about others, you must also act and keep working hard and try to do more than you ever thought was possible. It’s vital to think of your work and to focus on what you do because thinking of others isn't going to magically make you become the genius you desire to be. I reassure myself by thinking of the thousands of other colleges that are available, because Stanford isn’t the one and only college you can find. Although I’m not a genius, I know that my dedication, hard working ethic, and ambitions to get into a good college will somehow guide me toward a successful life and hopefully my dream may come true.                




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