I try my hardest not to change my initial opinions just because it is different from how society perceives it, however I have realized that is one of the most difficult challenges to achieve in our world. It all starts before we are even born. When our parents get the exciting news of what gender we are, they buy us clothes according to our genders. Girls get pink and the boys get blue. That is what clothing companies offer, therefore society accepts that concept as a rule. Basically, before we are even born, society is already shaping our future and who we are as independent human beings with a wide variety of choices to make. Before we are born, our identity is gradually being formed for us. Therefore our freedom to be who we want to be is already being chosen for us before we are even born.

When we are toddlers, most girls end up in dance class while the little boys play T-ball or soccer. Again, because these activities and hobbies are displayed as “proper” for each gender on social media, movies and advertisements, we hypnotically follow which ever way society directs us in. Ever since I was three years old, I took dance class and to this day, all I do is ballet. Despite my never ending passion and desire for the art of dance, I oftentimes wonder what sport I would be doing today if I hadn’t been initially put in ballet class at the age of three. I always wished I had time for soccer or basketball however once I was introduced to dance I couldn’t step away from it.

Now a days, my life is surrounded by social media and technology, so are most people of this generation. There is not one day when I don’t have my phone by my side and when that does happen, which is very rare, I feel very anxious as if a part of me were missing. Social media is a black hole that I unfortunately got sucked into. Instagram, snapchat and galore, all of these apps are neatly organized on the homescreen on my phone. How instagram and society shaping my life is unequivocally related. I may spend ten minutes thinking of what to write as a caption for a picture I am about to post, whether it is a selfie, or sushi, I tend to care about how I word things in fear of being judged. Society has created a funny way of handling social media. I almost feel as if there are rules for how to own an account that is accepted by society. There is definitely pressure to say the right thing, or post certain pictures for certain occasions. What I worry about is the fact that if one doesn’t obey these “rules”, they will be judged and viewed negatively. Therefore, they are forced to change themselves in order to fit in with the way society thinks and acts.

In addition to hobbies and social media, what we look like on the outside is one of the most common ways people are judged. My younger brother, ten years old, has a pink T-shirt and he refuses to wear it because “it is pink” and pink is a girly color. He is afraid of being teased at school for wearing a color that only girls wear. Social media promotes this idea which makes us constantly ask, “What will people think if…” Furthermore, while there was a big sale going on at Nordstroms, my mom was shopping online for winter boots for me and I noticed a pattern. I didn’t ask for a specific brand of shoes, however the only ones my mom showed me were from very popular brands like Uggs, Sorel and Hunter. I thought to myself, “There are hundreds of other brands that make shoes almost identical to the ones you are showing me and they are much cheaper. So why do we need to look into the most expensive brands?” But then I realized, it is cool to own Uggs and the more you have, the ‘cooler’ you are. It is unbelievable that people have made certain brands or styles of clothing show how one is better than another.

Unless we completely isolate ourselves and have no contact with the rest of the world, it is then that we live each day as the original us. We would live with our own opinions and our own perspectives. However, that is not how life works and each day our opinions and views on certain topics are constantly being changed because we let society shape it for us. Social construct is crucial to understand, for it is what makes each of us who we are today. For example, if you see a male and female, who are not related to each, hug or hold hands, you might immediately conclude that they are dating when in reality they are actually best friends. But just because they do what society expects couples to do, they are immediately judged. This is how society changes us to believe that certain actions draw certain conclusions.

Overall, I have come to understand that the person I am today is different that who I would be if society didn’t influence my opinions and views on ideas and concepts. Society shapes us through our gender, it dictates what jobs would be suitable for us, what we should wear, how we should look, who we are to socialise with and what is acceptable or not. Society shapes us into how they want their citizens to be and how they want gender roles to be played out. Now, women are definitely stronger and more independent than a century ago, however men still seem to have the real power. Most of the big leaders of our world are male, whether it is the president, the CEO of a company or the governor of a state. Just because society thinks one way, others are pressured to change themselves to fit in with society. In my opinion, if everyone conforms to society to avoid being an outcast, the world would be a very dull place.

Remember that we are born with the rights to have our own opinions and if you let society change that for you, you are not yourself anymore. So my goal in my life is to be confident in who I am and not let what society thinks affect my self esteem. My answer to “does society shape who we are” is therefore yes.